


Blood calls to Blood

by Lakritzwolf



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Trauma, Evil Asmodeus, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of past abuse, Past Abuse, Trauma, post season 3B
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2019-11-28 17:51:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 28,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18211610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lakritzwolf/pseuds/Lakritzwolf
Summary: Magnus is confronted with a ghost from his past - a haunt he had no idea existed.





	1. Chapter 1

Magnus was humming under his breath as he puttered around in his study. He’d had an easy day, with a few clients who had come to him with problems that had been easy to solve. Now he was cleaning up a bit after his last potion which, admittedly, had been a bit messy, but everything involving wolfsbane pollen had the tendency to react a little volatile.

So far, so good. He had dinner planned as well, although he knew that Alec’s job is prone to destroy dinner plans on a regular basis. Nothing a little magic couldn’t solve, however, so he got ready and took a shower to get rid of the stench of scorched pollen.

Looking at himself in the mirror afterwards he then tried to decide on a style and colour scheme of make-up. Sure, he could use magic for that. But his bitter little experience three years ago had taught him to never ever let his skills get so rusty again. So ever since, he styled himself the mundane way at least once a week. Same with the food; he had learned and practised how to prepare all kinds of dishes and baked goods, and had to admit it had a certain satisfaction to pull a bread out of the oven that had been made by his own hands, not magic.

Alec approved. By now. In the beginning Magnus’ attempts had been less than satisfactorily and sometimes outright disappointing, but Alec would rather cut off his own foot than make Magnus feel bad about something he put so much effort in, so he had eaten it anyway without as much as a twitch of his lips. Thankfully, Magnus had quickly improved.

“Looking good,” he said to himself, looking at his mirror image, and winked at himself. Forcing those memories out of his mind he left the bathroom to get dressed.

Unsurprisingly, Alec was late for dinner.

Late turned into very late.

And just as Magnus began to worry, his phone rang. Preparing himself for a cancelled dinner and a lonely evening, Magnus picked up his phone.

_“Magnus...”_

Alec’s voice made him frown and a knot of worry formed in his stomach.

“What’s wrong?”

 _“It’s... complicated.”_ Alec took a deep breath. _“Earlier today we...”_ Then Alec huffed and cleared his throat. _“Listen, I don’t want to explain this over the phone. Could you come to the Institute?”_

“Now?”

 _“Yes, I know...”_ Alec’s voice was heavy. _“I know we had dinner planned and everything, but this... it’s important. I really... you should come to the Institute.”_

“All right.” Magnus was already on his way to the door. “Since I know you never ask me things like that for shits and giggles, here I come.”

_“Thanks.”_

There wasn’t a trace of relief in Alec’s voice and Magnus frowned at the screen for a moment before he shrugged and pocketed his phone.

After stepping out of the portal in front of the Institute Magnus rolled his shoulders and headed for the door, all the time wondering what could possibly have Alec so worried.

It got worse when he saw Alec’s face as he entered the Institute. He was waiting for Magnus in the entryway, pacing back and forth with crossed arms, his shoulders tense. His mouth was a thin line, and his hair was a mess, a sure sign of having dug his hands into it repeatedly.

“Alexander?”

Alec tried to smile at him, but failed utterly. “Thanks for coming.”

“What seems to be the problem?”

Alec remained silent as they strode down the corridors of the Institute. Even as they entered the back elevator into the vaults, Alec hadn’t spoken another word.

“Alexander, I’m really worried now.” Magnus touched his shoulder.

“I don’t know how to...” Alec closed his eyes and swallowed. “This is...”

The elevator doors opened and the two stepped out and walked down the corridor towards the holding cell. A man was sitting on a chair behind the glass, dressed in worn, almost threadbare clothes and a coat with a high collar that was chafed through at the elbows. Long, black hair hung around his face in slightly greasy strands. He was wearing sunglasses, and he sat hunched over, as if he was in pain, or in fear. Or maybe both.

“We found him creeping around the Institute earlier today,” Alec explained. “He set off the Downworlder sensors.”

“Surely not another Daylighter, or you wouldn’t be so out of sorts,” Magnus said, casting Alec a short, worried look.

“No vampire, no werewolf. He’s a warlock, and he came here to ask specifically for your help.”

“Oh.”

The man looked up slowly, but his eyes were hidden behind the dark shades.

After a moment, Magnus inhaled deeply when he realised that more than just the unkempt appearance was off.

“Why is he down here, but not in magic-suppressing shackles?”

Alec nervously licked his lips a few times before he answered.

“He says he can’t use magic.”

A heavy silence dropped around them.

“Oh.”

Alec took another deep breath. “But that’s not the only issue. Nobody but Izzy, Jace, and Underhill know he’s here, by the way, and I think it has to stay that way.”

“Will you please get to the point, Alexander.” Magnus was beginning to feel physically uncomfortable under the stare of the warlock that he couldn’t even see.

“He hasn’t spoken a word after asking for you,” Alec went on. “So hopefully he’ll talk to you now.”

“Why should he talk to me? Because I’m a warlock?”

“That, too.”

“Too?” Magnus crossed his arms. “Alexander, stop being so cryptic. Why can’t you not just tell me what the matter is with this guy?”

Alec turned around to look at him. “Sorry, this threw me off track. I didn’t want it to happen to you as well. But there isn’t...” He huffed and turned around, and switched on the intercom.

“He’s here.”

The warlock got up from his chair and walked slowly towards the glass separating him from Magnus and Alec. He was tall, as tall as Alec, but very lean, the coat hanging off his shoulders.

“Magnus...” he said, and his voice was low, slightly husky, and vibrating with an emotion that was impossible to identify. Then he reached up and slowly, pulled the sunglasses off his face.

Magnus felt as if someone had punched him off the roof of a building, all his breath leaving his chest at once. It wasn’t only the face that looked eerily familiar, it was the eyes too, looking at him from what he felt was beyond the grave.

The golden cat eyes rested on him unblinkingly for a long moment, and the thin lips curved into a smile that was all too familiar too, albeit from another face. He dimly registered Alec’s hand on his shoulders.

The warlock on the other side of the glass stepped a little closer. His face was narrow, the cheekbones almost protruding under the pale skin; he looked gaunt, as if he hadn’t eaten properly in weeks, if not months. His voice was low, and the tremor of exhaustion fit the shadows under his eyes, but not the attempt at a smile.

“Hello, brother.”


	2. Chapter 2

Magnus stared at the face in front of him with a cold feeling of dread seeping into his bones. It couldn’t be true... but no matter how much he wanted to deny it, there simply was no denying the cat eyes, or the facial features that betrayed the other man’s parentage. 

“I have a brother?” Magnus hardly recognized his own voice. 

The expression on the stranger’s face turned from apprehensive to resigned, and he dropped his head. After shaking his head a few times he looked up again, and there was a bitter twist around his lips, too bitter to be called a smile. 

“He never told you,” he said in a dull, heavy voice. “He really never told you about me.”

Magnus could only shake his head. 

A small huff escaped the stranger, and he took another step towards the glass separating him from Magnus and Alec. His eyes widened, just a little, and his smile widened a little too, just the tiniest bit toothy now. 

“I should have known,” he said, his voice trembling. “You weren’t supposed to know, after all. The whole point of this...” He snorted. “This... existence.”

“I... I don’t understand,” Magnus said, rubbing his index fingers with his thumbs, on both hands. 

“How would you.” A mirthless chuckle. “You were a child.”

Magnus took a step back, and looked up at Alec in utter dismay. Alec however crossed his hands behind his back and his eyes rested on the stranger in nothing but distrust. Not hostility, not yet. But he definitely didn’t trust him, or the story he told. 

After taking a deep breath Magnus swallowed hard and stepped towards the glass again. “What is your name?”

“My name?” The stranger’s face went completely blank. His lips parted he stared at nothing for a moment before huffed out a breath, the corners of his lips twitching as he did so. “I... I can’t remember...”

His empty look wandered across Magnus’ form for a moment before he managed to focus on his face. 

“I can’t remember,” he said in a low voice. “It’s been too long... and the name... _he_... gave me... he took it from me.”

“He.” Magnus nervously licked his lips. “That would be...”

“Our father, yes.” The smile that now appeared on the strangers lips was sweet, the same way arsenic is sweet. “Our dear old father in hell.”

Shaking his head, Magnus took a deep breath. “I don’t... I just don’t understand. Why did he take your name?”

Alec took a small step forward. “And what should we call you?”

The stranger pressed both palms against the glass, and his eyes widened to the same degree as his grin. “How about useless?” He snarled. “Or worthless? Pathetic? No?” He rolled his eyes upward with a mock-thoughtful frown before his face lit up into a bright grin, his eyes even wider now. “I know! A clump of dirt on the boot of the universe!” He laughed, a little too shrill, and a little too loud. “How is that?”

Alec and Magnus exchanged another troubled look, but the stranger walked back towards the chair and sat heavily down. He slipped his sunglasses back on, and rested his elbows on his knees, his head dropping forward. 

“A brother?” Alec asked, facing Magnus with his arms still crossed.

“I swear, Alexander, I had no idea.” Magnus looked at the stranger and back at Alec. “I honestly had no idea. And I don’t even know what to think right now.”

“This could be a trick,” Alec said, a deep frown on his face. “The eyes could be a glamour. Someone who wants to gain your trust and use you.”

Magnus blinked a few times, then his face relaxed a little. “Always the vigilant Shadowhunter,” he said fondly. “I can take care of that easily. The question if it’s a glamour, I mean. I just need to go examine him.”

“Inside, I assume,” Alec said, face still dark, and mustered the stranger with a brooding look. 

“Alexander,” Magnus said with a sigh. “I honestly don’t know what to think or what to do. But we can’t pretend he isn’t here, and I have to start somewhere, so establishing if he is indeed a son of Asmodeus is the only logical starting point.”

“Right,” Alec said and slowly uncrossed his arms. 

The stranger didn’t move when Alec and Magnus entered the cell, but Alec didn’t take his eyes off him even after he had locked the door. He didn’t have his bow, but there was a seraph blade in his thigh holster, and his hand hovered above it, the fingers hanging loosely down. A warrior ready to strike any second. 

Magnus however slowly approached the stranger who was still sitting hunched over on the chair. 

“I really don’t know what to do about this,” Magnus said carefully. “I mean, I have to call you something. There has to be a name?”

“The name I received upon my birth is gone,” the stranger said without moving. “Long forgotten. And the name Asmodeus gave me, he took away again as well when he took my magic.”

Magnus froze, as if someone had poured a bucket of ice water over his head. 

“He took your magic?” He managed to say after a moment. 

“Yes.” Now the stranger straightened up, slowly, and equally slowly got onto his feet again. He turned around and took off the shades, slipping them into a pocket of his threadbare coat as he looked at Magnus. “Because of you.”

His voice was heavy and sad, and now his eyes widened again, and he gritted his teeth, his lips trembling. 

“Because of you,” he said again, and his voice was unsteady and had a sharp edge to it. “Because you were everything I was not, and could never be!”

Magnus stared at him with parted lips, and took several deep breaths while shaking his head. 

“I came here,” the stranger went on and took a step towards Magnus, “to kill you.”


	3. Chapter 3

Alec had his seraph blade unsheathed within a heartbeat and stormed past Magnus before the latter could even react. The stranger stumbled back and his back hit the wall, and he stared at Alec who was now pointing the seraph blade at his throat.

“Alexander.” Magnus had finally found his wits again and grabbed Alec’s arm to pull the blade away. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, please. I’m sure there is more to this than meets the eye.”

Alec took a few deep breaths and finally stepped back, but the blade remained unsheathed in his hand as he stepped back to Magnus’ side.

“I came here to kill you,” the stranger said again, his eyes back on Magnus, and his voice was suddenly as brittle as charred bones. “But you... you were only a child.” His eyes were still too wide, too much white showing around the golden iris, but his voice was cracked with pain. “Just a little boy, so innocent, so beautiful...” He shook his head and closed his eyes. “I wanted to hate you... but you were just a little boy and none of it was your fault.”

Magnus could still do no more than helplessly shake his head. 

“I shouldn’t be surprised he never told you about me.” The stranger huffed out a bitter laugh. “He really went out of his way to erase everything about my existence except my life. And I still don’t know why he didn’t just kill me.” His eyes met Magnus’ again, and they were wider than before now. “But maybe it was my punishment for never being good enough, don’t you think? Because no matter what I did, I was never good enough. Not powerful enough. Not...” He snarled. “Not evil enough.”

He looked at Magnus with parted lips, his eyes clouded in pain and with deep creases carved into his forehead. He reached out, but long before his grimy hand with broken nails reached Magnus’ face, he dropped it again. 

“He said it was because it took him too long to find me,” he went on, in an unsteady voice, and he was shaking his head ever so slightly, but over and over again. “I was too old, he said. And then you came along, so beautiful, so young, so innocent, and so much more powerful than I could ever be.” 

He blinked slowly, and a single tear escaped his eye and washed a pale stripe into the grime on his cheek. 

“I never doubted that you were the favourite son, Magnus.” He took a shaky breath. “I would never... but I would have been a bad influence. A bad, bad influence. And so I had to be taken care of.”

Magnus had his lips pressed together, unable to find words. But nothing the stranger told him surprised him in any way. Asmodeus would have discarded a son he saw as useless without a second thought, and he would take everything from him before casting him out. 

“What did he do to you?” He finally asked, his voice husky. 

His brother looked at his hands, the broken, dirty nails, and the chapped skin. “He took my magic, tore it out of my body, and erased most of what had remained of my memories of my time before Edom.” He looked up at Magnus again. His eyes widened, and he shook his head. “He said if I ever would go near you, he would feed me to the Torturers of the Abyss.”

Magnus inhaled sharply. “He what?”

The stranger chuckled, or rather, giggled, a high-pitched sound that rubbed across the nerves like a shard of glass. “And he left me out there, in the wastes of Edom, without a scrap of magic. And for an eternity, all I could think of was revenge.” He shook his head and smiled at Magnus, a smile that would have been fond had it not been for the look in his wide eyes. “Without magic I was trapped there... hiding from the flying beasts and only kept alive by my thirst for revenge. But... I was too much of a coward to go back for you and risk facing him.”

Suddenly his whole posture sagged, his shoulders fell, his face went slack, and he lowered his eyes, shaking his head. 

“When I found the portal I didn’t even know where it led,” he said in a dead, dull voice. “I didn’t care. Everything was better than crawling around the dust in Edom. But then I ended up here and-”

“Hold it!” Alec lifted his arm again, using the sword to point at the stranger. “A portal? From Edom?”

The stranger looked up, shoulders hunched, and ducked away from him, his eyes glued to the blade with its glowing runes. Magnus however squared his shoulders and stepped between the two. 

“Alexander, I don’t think this has priority right now.”

“Are you kidding me?” Alec shook his head in disbelief. “Somewhere out there is a permanent portal to Edom! How can this not be the priority?”

“We will take care of the portal,” Magnus said, resting one hand on Alec’s shoulder. “But for now I really have to take care of this here first.”

“You don’t even know if any of what he says is true!” Alec glared at the stranger and back at Magnus. “He could be Asmodeus himself trying to trick you!”

What neither of them expected was the stranger bursting into laughter. Hysterical, manic laughter that made every hair on Magnus’ body stand on edge. 

“I could!” He said, and his grin looked almost like a grimace. “I could be any demon in disguise!”

Magnus sighed heavily and cast Alec a warning look before looking at his brother again. “Tell me, how long have you been in Edom?”

“In years?” He still giggled, and shook his head. “It’s not as if it has summer or winter down there!”

“No,” Magnus replied. “But is there anything you remember?”

The laughter died, and the smile vanished in an instant. He sighed, stared at nothing for a moment and then tilted his head. 

“There was a war,” he said eventually, his eyes staring into the distance. “The last time I was in the realm of man with my father, there was a war. I remember he was laughing at those tiny humans fighting about what they believed was a holy city, when all it was, was a gaggle of brick houses with roofs of straw surrounded by desert.”

“The crusades,” Alec said under his breath. 

“And when did you come back?” Magnus asked cautiously. “I mean after you found the portal. Do you know?”

His lips moving soundlessly, his brother still stared straight ahead. 

“Do you remember anything that happened?” Magnus went on. “Something in the news, something everyone talked about?”

It took the stranger another moment before he was able to answer.

“The moon,” he muttered. “They all talked about the moon...”

“The moon landing,” Magnus said and swallowed hard. “Is it that? The first man on the moon?”

“Yes...” He nodded, and looked at Magnus again. For once, his eyes were calm and clear. “Humans had conquered the heaven and turned it into sky.” He chuckled, and his smile was soft. “And suddenly the moon was only a rock in space.”

Magnus and Alec exchanged another look. 

“That was fifty years ago,” Alec said and looked at Magnus’ brother again. “You’ve been topside for fifty years...”

“It appears so,” the stranger replied and snapped his mouth shut. He smiled at Magnus, and there it was again, the bright shine, too much white, and the smile too wide. “And I was looking for you, little brother. Revenge was the only thing that kept me going... and then...” He laughed under his breath. “Then, when I found your trace, I learned that Asmodeus had failed in turning you into the perfect prince of Edom. You were helping people!” He laughed again, a little louder. “A good man! Oh how he must fume down there in Edom.” 

Then his laughter was gone as suddenly as it had appeared. The look he gave Magnus was one of utter longing. 

“But you don’t remember, because you never had anything to remember.” He swallowed, and his lower lip began to tremble. “My sweet, innocent baby brother.”

“I am... actually a few centuries old by now.” Magnus cleared his throat.

“Oh yes, I know.” His brother nodded enthusiastically, his eyes intent on Magnus’ face. “I know now that I spent centuries helpless and powerless in Edom.” He huffed. “Plus a few decades crawling around the realm of men trying to find you.”

“And now?” Alec said, stepping forward. “Now that you found him?”

“Now?” Magnus’ brother shook his head with a chuckle, and he stared at Alec for a moment with wide, hard eyes, before he looked down again. “I couldn’t hurt him if I wanted to.” After a moment, he looked up at Magnus again. “Even if I still had all of my magic, you would be so much more powerful it would be ridiculous to even think about trying to harm you.”

A heavy, uncomfortable silence settled in the cell, and Magnus was kneading his hands while pursing his lips. 

“And now?” Alec asked again, looking back and forth between Magnus and his brother.

Magnus looked up at him. “Now I have to come to grips with the fact that I have a brother, a brother who has suffered far more at our father’s hand than I could ever have been able to imagine.”

“Magnus, he took-”

“My magic,” Magnus said sharply. “Yes. And he took his. Don’t you understand?”

Alec inhaled softly through his nose and tilted his head. 

“This...” Magnus lifted one hand, indicating towards his brother. “This is me, Alexander. This is what I would have become. Asmodeus took his magic, but that clearly did not make him mortal. And I felt my mind already slipping even after the short time I had to go without magic. Having to live like that for centuries? It would have driven me into insanity as well.”

Magnus rolled his shoulders now and approached his brother in slow, cautious steps, as if he was afraid to spook him. 

“I know how you feel,” he said softly, and his brother looked up at him. “Asmodeus took my magic for a deal we made, even if I managed to get it back. But I know the feeling of being nothing but an empty shell. Of losing myself in nothing.”

His brother slowly turned around to fully face him. 

“I don’t know what to do,” Magnus went on. “But I want to help you. For now I can’t do anything concerning your magic, but what I can do is offer you shelter.”

“Magnus.” Alec closed his fingers around Magnus’ upper arm. “You want to take him home?”

“Should I leave him in the holding cell here in the Institute?” Magnus looked back at him. “Or maybe store him in one of the cellars of the Hotel Dumort?”

“No...” Alec licked his lips. “But...”

“Alexander, whatever else he may be, he is my brother. And while I appreciate you feeling protective, I can take care of myself. He doesn’t have his magic, but even if he had, he doesn’t look like he’d be able to use it.” 

Alec clearly wasn’t convinced, but he clearly couldn’t stop Magnus from taking care of his brother either. And while that nameless brother was obviously damaged, he also didn’t pose a threat to Magnus, or anyone else, in the state he was in. So Alec stepped back when Magnus opened a portal, and gave him a slight nod. 

Magnus nodded back, and gently and carefully, rested one hand on his brother’s shoulders. The light of hope in those golden eyes made him swallow, and he nodded and turned towards the portal. 

“I’ll be in touch,” Magnus said to Alec as he was about to step through. 

Alec nodded, and shook his head, running both hands through his hair as he watched the portal snap shut behind them.


	4. Chapter 4

After stepping out of the portal Magnus looked around, taking a few deep breaths. He wasn’t sure how to proceed from here, and he turned around to look at his brother, who was looking around as well. His shoulders were hunched, however, and he had his hands shoved deeply into the pockets of his coat. And his eyes were still wide as he took in his surroundings.

“Where... where are we?” He asked after a moment, his eyes landing on Magnus again.

“My apartment,” Magnus replied, and tried to smile. “Welcome.”

His brother stared at him, his face a mixture of disbelief and shock. “You brought me into your home?”

“Well, yes.” Magnus rolled his shoulders. “Where else would I take you?”

“I... don’t know.” His shoulders hunched even more. “The Silent City perhaps?”

Magnus stepped closer and smiled. “I don’t see you as a threat, honestly. No offence.”

Again, his brother’s answer was a sharp-edged chuckle. He shook his head and then looked at his feet, the smile vanishing again as he did so.

Magnus scrutinised him for a long, hard moment. He didn’t need magic to establish that he was indeed talking to his brother, and he also wasn’t in any doubt that he was looking at a broken man. A soul like a shattered mirror, all sharp edges and distorted images. He had no idea what restoring his magic would do to him, if it would help him regain his sanity – or at least part of it – or if it would drive him over the edge for good. It was clear, from the occasional glimpses, that he wasn’t completely gone yet, but he was damaged, maybe beyond repair.

“So, what happens now?” His brother asked after a moment without looking up.

“I suggest we start with getting you cleaned up and fed, hmm? And then we have to think of something to call you, apart from brother, or Magnus’ brother.”

“But that’s all I am.” His brother looked up, and his eyes were wide again, but he wasn’t smiling. “No matter what happens, I will always be Magnus Bane’s mad and useless brother.” His voice had hardened considerably with every word.

“That remains to be seen,” Magnus said firmly. “But first things first. You will feel better after a shower and a meal.”

His brother didn’t protest, and he followed Magnus into the guest bathroom. Magnus laid out a few towels and told him to take his time before he left him alone before he headed into the bedroom and his closet. He could, of course, give him some of Alec’s clothes since the two were of the same size, but he harboured strong doubts that Alec would be okay with it; even if he asked. Alec would say it’s okay to not upset Magnus, most likely.

But as if he had read his thoughts from afar, his phone announced an incoming text that very moment. It was from Alec.

_**A** Hey, if you need to borrow some clothes it’s fine._   
_**A** Just not the black hoodie you gave me last year._

_Thank you, Alexander. But I could as well adjust some of my own._

_**A** Keep your magic in case you need it. I don’t trust him yet._   
_**A** But you do, so he gets the benefit of doubt._   
_**A** Just call me if anything goes wrong._

_It’s all I can ask of you._   
_Thank you, and don’t worry, if something goes wrong you will be the first to know._

_**A** Good._   
_**A** Take care._

_Take care, my love._

_**A** <3_

Magnus smiled at the little heart, and slipped the phone back into his pocket.

Equipped with socks, a pair of boxers and sweatpants, a T-shirt and a hoodie Magnus headed for the bathroom again, and he knocked cautiously as the shower was turned off again.

“I got some clothes for you.”

“Thanks... um... you can come in.”

Magnus opened the door very slowly, but he felt dismay wash over him once again, and more than before, when he got a look at his brother’s body. He was so thin that gaunt was the only word that could describe it; Magnus could see his ribs from where he stood. His upper body was also covered in scars, long, thin lines of the telltale knotted tissue of burn scars. His father’s handiwork, no doubt. Some of them were so long they ran down his whole back and vanished behind the towel he had wrapped around his hips.

Suddenly his brother tensed and straightened up very slowly, and equally slowly, turned around.

“Father really went to town on you,” Magnus said softly, still shaken.

“He hated me,” his brother replied, gritting his teeth. “But no amount of punishment...” He swallowed and shook his head. “No amount of punishment could make me any stronger, or more powerful. I just...” His forehead creased, a few deep lines, and he closed his eyes with a sigh. “I was never good enough. I would never be good enough.”

“And then I came along and everything ended in the most catastrophic way possible,” Magnus said in a low voice.

His brother snorted and opened his eyes again, too much white visible around the iris, as so many times before. “Yes, because killing me would have been a mercy, and while our father is many things, merciful is not one of them.”

“No,” Magnus replied and took a deep breath.

The two looked at each other for a long, painfully silent moment.

“Right, “Magnus said then. “Here are some clothes. I’m going to make some food, anything you fancy?”

“I don’t care,” his brother said simply and took the offered clothes.

“No preferences?”

The look in his brother’s eyes turned hard again. “The last thing I ate were take-away leftovers I found in a trash can. I really don’t care.”

Magnus swallowed hard. “I’m sorry.”

His brother just huffed and dropped the towel, obviously unfazed by being naked in Magnus’ presence. Magnus turned around anyway, and rested one hand on the doorframe as he was about to leave.

“I know it must be hard accepting so much help like this, from me of all people, and that it would hurt your pride to be so-”

“Pride?” His brother’s laughter was cracked, and sharp-edged like a shard of glass. “How much pride do you think I have left after eating other people’s trash?”

Having no idea what to reply, Magnus softly closed the bathroom door behind him and headed for his kitchen with heavy steps.

It all still hadn’t quite sunken in, after it had all happened so fast. He had a brother. Asmodeus had sired another son, long before him, but had mercilessly discarded him in favour of Magnus and his greater power. And Magnus hadn’t had the slightest idea that there ever had been another child of Asmodeus, despite him having wondered about it every now and then. But now that he had proof, he didn’t quite know what he felt about it.

But that could wait. Right now his brother needed some simple care; food, shelter, clothes. Everything else would fall into place, and maybe he could pull him back from the edge of utter madness with some kindness and support, before he started on getting his magic back. A transfusion would work fine in this case since they shared the same magic through their demonic father, but that wouldn’t be permanent. So Magnus had to find a solution, but he knew it was possible, so all he had to do was some research.

Deciding on something simple for now in terms of food Magnus conjured up a loaf of bread, some cheese and ham, and a fruit bowl. By the time his brother emerged from the bathroom he had laid the table and added some coffee as well, and he beckoned his brother to take a seat.

And he really needed the food; while Alec’s clothes fit him in terms of height, he couldn’t nearly fill them out. The hoodie hung from his shoulders like a sack, and he had had to pull the string in the waistband of the sweatpants so tight they bulged around his hips.

“Dig in,” Magnus said. “I’m not hungry right now, but I can keep you company with a coffee if you like.”

His brother shrugged, as if to say it wasn’t his decision to make, and sat down. Magnus expected him to wolf down the food like the starving man he was, but he managed to keep a grip on himself and ate lot more civilised than Magnus would have thought possible for someone who had last eaten days ago, and from a trash can, no less.

To avoid more awkward silence, Magnus took a sip of coffee and decided to bring up the topic of names again.

“I know you can’t remember the name you got at birth, and neither the name your father gave you. But we need to call you something.”

He hunched over his plate, his eyes downcast as he pushed a few crumps around. “Why don’t you just give me one?”

“Because I want you to take control of your own life again. In whatever way possible.”

His brother froze and looked up, a disturbing, harried look in his eyes, something that looked too much like fear for Magnus’ liking.

“Is there anything that holds any meaning?” Magnus went on, trying to ignore the stare. “Anything?”

He looked at his plate again, and after a moment, he shrugged. Magnus waited patiently, and eventually, he found his words again.

“When I... when I came here. From Edom, I mean. The portal.” He hesitantly looked up, and Magnus could see tears in his eyes. “After so long a time... it was night. I’ll never forget that. I couldn’t believe I really had escaped Edom, but I looked at the stars, and I knew I was free.”

“Maybe a star then, or something astronomical?” Magnus suggested, and when all he got as reply was a puzzled look, he took his phone and pulled up a page about constellations and their meanings. He shoved it across the table and then got up to sit down next to his brother who frowned at the screen.

“I like... the sound of that one,” he finally muttered.

“Orion?” Magnus smiled encouragingly. “The archer?”

“Um...” His brother frowned and shrugged. “I’m not really...”

Magnus waited for a moment, but he didn’t continue. “How about this one? Corvus? The Raven? You do have nice black hair.”

Magnus kept the smile firmly in place and tried not to sound suggestive. This wasn’t his decision to make, and he had to avoid nudging him at all costs. It had to be his brother’s decision alone.

His brother didn’t seem convinced by Corvus either, however.

“And that one?” Magnus asked after further scrolling through the list. “Are you familiar with the legend?”

“The phoenix?” His brother looked up.

“The fiery beautiful bird rising from his own ashes.” Magnus smiled at him in encouragement. “How about that?”

“I’m neither beautiful nor-”

“That’s not the point,” Magnus interrupted him gently. “The point is that you can rise from the ashes of your own past, and maybe find happiness and peace, a place here among mortals and warlocks in the Downworld. Even if only to spite our father.”

His brother just stared at him now, and their eyes met. Magnus couldn’t deny he had some troubles holding that gaze, the stare coming from the depths of a damaged soul. Maybe it had been too early to confront him with something as significant and life-changing as this.

“There are a lot of others, so don’t worry. We can get back to this tomorrow, or whenever you feel ready.”

“No...” It was hardly audible. “I like... I like this one.”

“The phoenix?” Magnus kept his voice calm, but him choosing that name seemed a step into the right direction. “It suits you. Very fitting for someone taking his life back from the one who destroyed it.”

His brother nodded, slowly, hesitantly, as if he was afraid he would wake up from this dream if he moved too fast, but there was a faint light behind the gold in his eyes.

That was the moment that Magnus felt his doubt all leave him. He had a brother, blood family, a brother who was in desperate need of help and support. There wasn’t a chance that Magnus would ever let anything happen to him, ever again.

“Will you help me?” His brother asked after a moment in a broken whisper.

“Every step of the way, Phoenix,” Magnus said calmly but firmly, and rested one hand atop if his brother’s.

And Phoenix smiled at him through his tears, for the first time a real, true smile, and it gave Magnus hope.


	5. Chapter 5

Once the food was cleared away Magnus fussed a little over his brother, making him get comfortable on one of the couches, and offered to switch on the TV for distraction. He was burning to know more about him, but apart from having been trapped in Edom for most of his life, there wasn’t much to tell. And even asking about that would only tear open wounds that Magnus was not sure he could treat. They would have to take it one step at a time. 

He cast another look at his brother – Phoenix – as he was curled up on the couch, hugging a pillow. He looked exhausted, his eyes almost clouding over, and the way he held himself triggered all of Magnus protective instincts. True, his brother was older by a few centuries, technically, but somehow he gave the impression of being much, much younger. 

“Phoenix?” But when he didn’t get a reaction, he smiled and raised his voice. “Phoenix!”

His brother snapped to attention and looked up at him with wide eyes. Then he relaxed a tiny bit, a nervous smile on his lips. 

“That’s... that’s me, right?”

“Your chosen name,” Magnus confirmed with a smile. God, that man was really as easily to spook as a wild animal. “If you don’t mind, can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.” He hugged the pillow tighter.

“I was wondering how old you were when father found you,” Magnus ventured cautiously. “If you remember. But don’t worry if you don’t, it’s not important. I’m just curious.”

“I...” Phoenix swallowed and stared straight ahead with a frown. “I don’t know...”

“But you weren’t a child anymore, were you?”

Phoenix looked up at him and shook his head. “No, I was older.”

The fact that Asmodeus had found his son during adolescence explained a lot. It explained why he hadn’t been able to form Phoenix into the perfect prince, and why Phoenix himself felt so much younger than Magnus. He had been in contact with abused teenagers before, and he could draw a lot of parallels when looking at his brother. Not that he was a teenager, mentally or otherwise, but there seemed to be parts of him that had gotten stuck in limbo after his magic had been torn out before being cast into a horrible trauma. 

And Magnus began to ask himself if he was actually qualified to deal with a soul as damaged as his. He would try, of course he would try everything in his power, but even a deep understanding of the human psyche wouldn’t help him a lot in this case because he didn’t have the knowledge and tools to deal with it.

Phoenix was already dozing off again, and Magnus walked towards the couch and cautiously gave his feet a nudge with one of his own. Phoenix tensed and his head flew up. 

“It’s okay,” Magnus said calmly. “I just wanted to suggest you go to bed. You’re falling asleep.”

“I’m trying not to,” Phoenix muttered and straightened up. “I probably should find myself... a place to sleep and...”

“If you think I’m letting you go out there to sleep on a park bench then you’re wrong,” Magnus said and gestured at him to get up. “We have more than enough space here.”

Phoenix got up very hesitantly and only belatedly noticed the pillow. He dropped it onto the couch and followed Magnus across the room. 

“We?”

“Me and Alec.” Magnus opened the door to the guest room. 

“Alec... the...” Phoenix’ voice was trembling.

“Yes, the Shadowhunter you met earlier. I know he’s protective of me, and he is very good at his job. Please do not hold it against him.” Magnus gave his brother an encouraging smile.  
“You two...” Phoenix cleared his throat, “...are...”

“Married.”

Phoenix’ eyes widened and he looked around as if he feared Alec would jump out from behind a piece of furniture to impale him. “That’s why he didn’t want you to... I can’t stay here!” His eyes widened even more. “I can’t!”

“You can, and you will.” Magnus opened the door. “It’s perfectly safe. And if you can’t trust him, then trust me. You’re here because I want you here, and he won’t hurt you. Promised.”

His brother looked unconvinced and was still hunched over. 

“Phoenix, I really mean it.” Magnus cautiously rested a hand on his brother’s shoulder. “You have a place here for long as you need it. And with that I don’t mean you’re going to live with us forever. But you need a safe place to get up to speed again, and then we see how you can build yourself a life here.”

Phoenix looked at the bed, and back at Magnus, wrapped in an air of deep, quiet discomfort. 

“Is something wrong?” Magnus asked, cursing himself immediately. It would have been easier to ask what wasn’t wrong.

“I...” Slinging his arms around his chest, Phoenix stared at the bed, eyes wide and teeth clenched. “You... I think you have to... lock me in.”

“Most certainly not,” Magnus almost snapped. 

Phoenix spun around now to face him, but he was still hugging himself, and there was more than a trace of fear in his eyes. “You don’t understand...” He swallowed. “I... I sleepwalk.”

“Oh.” Magnus nodded. “I see. I still won’t lock you up, because you’re not a prisoner here.”

“But I... I...” Phoenix started shaking his head, a minuscule move, but over and over again. “Sometimes there are hours missing, even during daytime, and I just don’t know what happened. I wake up so often... not where I went to sleep.”

Magnus gave his brother another long, scrutinising look. “Well, then I shall put a ward on your door that will alert me should it happen.” Magnus snapped his fingers to summon his magic, and wrote the ward into the door without thinking. Only when he was done did he realised that Phoenix was staring at him, or rather, Magnus’ hands, with a strange, almost feral hunger in his eyes. And there it was again, eyes hard like glass with too much white, the lips a thin, narrow line. 

“We will fix this,” Magnus said gently, and it tore Phoenix out of whatever dark place his mind had fallen into. 

He swallowed hard and nodded, and walked hesitantly towards the bed. 

“Good night,” Magnus said, and Phoenix offered him an attempt at a smile that looked very unconvincing. 

Magnus could understand the sentiment, and he shook his head with a sigh as he gently closed the door. If something seems too good to be true, then it usually is, but in this case, there were no strings attached. Not as far as Magnus was concerned. 

It all was a lot to process, and when Alec came home later in the evening, Magnus was still sitting on a couch with a whiskey tumbler in his hand. 

“Tough night?”

Magnus looked up with a tired smile. “Emotionally taxing.”

Alec sat down next to him. “Want to talk about it?”

Magnus rubbed his fingers across his chin and sighed, then knocked back his whiskey. The glass immediately refilled itself, but Magnus put it down. 

“The fact that I suddenly have a brother is a lot to handle,” he began after a moment. “But the fact that he has been mentally and physically abused – horribly abused – makes it ten times harder.”

Alec didn’t say anything, but took one of Magnus’ hands between his own. 

“He is... constantly afraid, Alexander. When he’s not staring at me looking like the Joker about to break out in maniacal laughter, he’s afraid. And I think he’s also afraid of himself. He was talking about sleepwalking and periods of time he has no recollection of.”

“So his mind is really damaged.”

“He definitely needs more than a few clean clothes and a shower.”

Magnus shook his head and reached for his tumbler again. He took a large sip and closed his eyes. 

“I can’t even begin to describe it, Alexander. It’s like he is two persons. There is a part of him that’s all sharp edges and wild looks, and another part that looks and sounds like a scared child. And I... I fear I’m biting off more than I can chew.”

“So you can’t fix him?” Alec tilted his head.

After meeting his eyes for a moment, Magnus could only shake his head. “I don’t think I can, Alexander.”

“Well.” Alec ran his thumb across the back of Magnus’ hand. “Then we have to find someone who can.”

“We?” Magnus looked at him with a frown.

“Yeah.” Alec smiled, a small, but honest smile. “He’s your family. And your family is my family.”  
Magnus smiled as well, but then he lifted both eyebrows. “Did you happen to speak to Isabelle about this?”

Alec didn’t reply at first, but then he looked past Magnus again and straight ahead. A slightly bashful smile appeared on his face. “Maybe.”

Magnus shook his head with a fond, warm smile, and leaned closer to nudge Alec’s temple with his nose. “Do you need dinner?”

“No, I ate at the Institute. I figured you might be busy.”

“Bed, then?” Magnus got up and arched his back.

“Sounds good to me.” Alec got up as well. “It was quite the day.”

“Quite the day indeed,” Magnus replied with a slight shake of his head. 

He cast another look at the door of the guest room, and did a quick check of the ward. Satisfied that Phoenix could go nowhere without him instantly knowing about it, Magnus followed Alec into the bedroom. 

He didn’t fall asleep for a long time though, as tired as he was. And when sleep finally caught up with him, his dreams were restless and filled with darkness and hues of red and orange.


	6. Chapter 6

Magnus was torn out of a dream he couldn’t remember by the uncomfortable tugging of his wards. Under normal circumstances, an opening bedroom door would not have given him anything to think about as everyone might need the bathroom at night, but since Phoenix had warned Magnus about sleepwalking, Magnus cautiously left the bed. He slipped on his robe and tip-toed out of the room, but didn’t shut the door completely.

Sure enough, he could hear steps, but not towards the bathroom, or back. For whatever reason Phoenix was in the kitchen, and while Magnus knew he might just need a glass of water, he silently crept along the wall towards the kitchen anyway. Something was bothering him about his brother that wasn’t just his contradictory nature, and while he would have preferred to let Phoenix at least physically recover somewhat, it was quite possible the decision had been taken out of his hands now. 

Phoenix was outlined as dark shadow against the lights of New York outside, but even in the dim light Magnus saw the shimmer of metal in his hand. 

The knife block. 

Magnus summoned his magic and Phoenix spun around, the largest knife clutched in his hand. 

“Gullible fool,” he snarled, baring his teeth at Magnus. “You really believed everything.”

Magnus didn’t reply, but kept his magic ready as he took a few steps backward into the open area of the living room. 

“Phoenix, don’t do this. I don’t want to hurt you.”

The laughter bubbling from his brother’s lips made every hair on Magnus’ body stand on edge. “Oh no, you don’t want to hurt me, your precious brother.”

“Phoenix...” Magnus took a deep breath. “Put the knife down.”

“Or else?” Phoenix took another step forward, and the larger windows allowed more light into the room, so Magnus could see how wide his eyes were, and how wild, and his grin was nothing but a grimace. 

“Phoenix...”

“That is not my name, and we both know that.” Another of those sharp-edged chuckles.   
Magnus lifted both hands, palms forward. “Drop the knife, please.”

Phoenix took another step forward, and Magnus took another step back. He had seen the state his brother’s body was in and he wanted to avoid attacking him with magic at all costs, and since the bedroom door was still open maybe Alec would hear him without Magnus calling for aid. Because that would likely prompt Phoenix into attacking him, and then Magnus would have no choice but to use magic. 

“I didn’t get this far to play your meek little pet brother,” Phoenix snarled and took another step forward. “You will pay for every little thing that father took from me, only to give it to you.”  
Taking a deep breath, Magnus took another step back. “Phoenix, listen to me. You said before it wasn’t my fault. I know you suffered, but this can end if you let me help you.”

“Help me?” Phoenix barked out a gravelly laughter. “No, you don’t want to help me; you want to ease your bad conscience.” He hefted the knife. “I don’t need your help. I don’t want it. I’ve been dreaming of this moment for centuries.” He inhaled deeply through his nose. “Do you know the meaning of agony? Do you know how it feels like when your magic is being taken from you? It feels like your spine is being torn out of your body.” He slowly closed his eyes, and opened them again equally slow. “You know nothing about suffering. Being burned, and tortured, and mutilated, cast out without magic, alone in the wastes of Edom.” He snarled and thrust out his forefinger at Magnus. “Because of the pretty innocent little boy! Everything you have is only yours because father took it from me first!!”

Phoenix lifted the knife but then he suddenly faltered, and looked utterly puzzled for a second before his widened in naked terror. 

“Magnus...”

“Phoenix, put the knife down.”

But his brother’s face hardened again into a grimace of fury, the eyes burning with hate and madness. It was all the proof Magnus would ever need. 

“All the agony, everything because of you! It was all your fault!”

Magnus threw up his hands as Phoenix charged with a roar, but before his magic could discharge, Alec jumped out of the bedroom, seraph blade glowing. 

“Don’t hurt him!” Magnus yelled. “Hold him down!”

Alec dropped the blade and dashed forward, and careened into Phoenix at full speed. He clamped both arms around Phoenix’ upper body, immobilising his arms, and kicked the knife away when he dropped it. 

“Hold him!” Magnus summoned his magic again, a large, glowing orb or orange. “Do not let go!”

Alec tightened his grip on the struggling man in his arms, but the starved and weakened body was no match against a Shadowhunter. Alec braced himself against the impact of Magnus’ magic and closed his eyes when it hit. 

Phoenix screamed. 

Magnus pushed again, summoned even more magic into the stream that poured into his brother. Alec gritted his teeth with a grunt as the body he was holding began to spasm and kick. 

“Hold him!” Magnus yelled again, and still pouring his magic into his brother, began to chant. 

And suddenly a mass of dark, oily smoke gushed out of Phoenix’ mouth and nose, and he instantly went limp in Alec’s arms. Alec, as a trained Shadowhunter, didn’t miss a beat; he dropped the body and made a dive for his weapon. Rolling onto his feet he faced the demon again that Magnus had contained, and slashed through it with the glowing seraph blade. 

A high-pitched, inhuman screech petered out into a whistle as the smoke collapsed into a heap of crackling embers, which then dissipated with a sizzle. 

“Did you know he was possessed?” Alec asked and lowered himself down onto one knee next to Phoenix’ unmoving body.

“I began to suspect it when he talked about sleepwalking,” Magnus replied and knelt down next to his brother. “Phoenix?”

“Is he okay?” Alec asked, but held his breath when Magnus turned him around. 

Phoenix was limp, and he wasn’t breathing. 

“No...” Magnus shook his head and felt for a pulse. “No, not like this... Phoenix.... please hold on...”

The magic that Magnus poured into his brother’s body now was a cool, silvery blue, and it crept across his skin in tendrils of light. 

“Please...” Magnus was breathing heavily. “Please... come on... Phoenix, you have to breathe...”

Another surge of blue magic was pushed into Phoenix’ chest, and he jerked with a high-pitched gasp for air. He coughed, and gulped down some more air, and heaved, and then he convulsed, and proceeded to hurl the contents of his stomach across the carpet. Magnus cleaned up the mess with a snap of his fingers, his eyes on his brother who had curled up into foetal position. 

“Phoenix,” Magnus said softly and rested a hand on the back of his brother’s neck. “It’s okay. It’s over.”

But his brother was just breathing heavily, hoarse gasps of air and shaky exhales. Magnus took one of his hands in his, and only registered at the edge of his awareness that Alec got up and left. 

“Magnus?”

Magnus looked up and at Alec who just emerged from the bedroom again, running his stele across the strength rune on his arm. He dropped the stele onto the armrest of the sofa and went down into a crouch next to Magnus. 

“We should probably get him to bed,” he said and slipped one arm under Phoenix’ legs, the other under his shoulders. Getting onto his feet he shook his head with a sigh. “He weighs nothing.”

“I happened to see him shirtless after his shower, and I could count his ribs without making an effort,” Magnus said and opened the door to the guest room. “And that’s why I didn’t want to test my theory about the demonic possession yet. I was hoping he could build up a little more physical strength first, to avoid precisely this from happening.”

Alec gentle set Phoenix down onto the bed and Magnus pulled up the duvet to cover him. He hadn’t opened his eyes, hadn’t moved at all anymore, but at least he was breathing. 

Magnus straightened up and stared down at his brother with a deep frown on his face, and his lips pressed together. Alec draped one arm across his shoulders and stepped close, but Magnus couldn’t relax. 

Alec shook his head and took a deep breath. “So he’s been tortured, and had his magic ripped out of his body, and has been under demonic possession for who knows how long.”

“Probably since his early days in Edom,” Magnus said heavily. “There are a lot of lesser demons who would have found him an easy prey in the state he must have been in, after being cast out without magic. They feed on negative emotions, and there doubtlessly were a lot of those.”  
“So, he’s been like this for centuries?”

Magnus nodded, swallowing hard. “Most likely.”

They both looked at Magnus’ unconscious brother in silence. 

“I can’t do this, Alexander,” Magnus said in a husky voice. “I can’t deal with this. I don’t know what I’m doing, and I’m afraid I will only make it worse.”

“Then we find someone who can help,” Alec said and tightened his hold for a moment. “I’m sure you know someone.”

Magnus didn’t reply for a moment. “I don’t,” he said. “But I will find someone.”


	7. Chapter 7

Giving up on sleep as a lost cause, Magnus settled down on the chair next to Phoenix’ bed and watched his brother’s face. Phoenix still hadn’t moved when the first sunlight began to turn the darkness into grey around him, the only sign he was still alive his slow, shallow breathing.

During those hours Magnus had sat there in silent vigil, he had been wracking his brain, digging through memories so deep and old he would have loved to be able to completely forget them. Now he unearthed every single one and stared at them in the merciless light of the new day, trying desperately to find something that could have told him about this. 

He found nothing. Nothing at all, and he still couldn’t help the feeling that he should have known. 

He was still sitting there doubting himself and his memory when Alec cautiously opened the door, a large mug with coffee in his hand. 

“Here,” he said softly and put the cup on the nightstand. “I need to go the Institute, but please call me if there’s anything I can do.”

“Thank you.” Magnus leaned towards him, and Alec pecked a kiss onto his forehead. 

“Anything?” Alec asked then, his eyes on Phoenix’ unmoving face.

“Nothing,” Magnus said and sighed. “I sent Catarina a message. Maybe she sees something I can’t.”

Alec left, and Magnus was left in the murky twilight and heavy silence of the room around him. He sipped his coffee, listened to Phoenix’ irregular breaths, and wondered how on earth he could fix this. In truth, however, he knew that he couldn’t. His brother’s soul was so damaged by the torture and demonic possession that all simple care and kindness could do was not make it worse. The only thing left to him was find someone who could.

Catarina had been on nightshift and stopped by on her way home; Magnus hadn’t told her what the problem was, only that he needed to talk to her and that it wasn’t something he could explain via a fire message. 

To say Catarina was baffled when Magnus explained things to her was an understatement. She stared at him with parted lips, blinking slowly like an owl, for almost a minute. 

“A brother,” she finally said, and sighed.

“I couldn’t believe it at first, either. But he does have my... our father’s eyes.”

Catarina shook her head once and pressed her lips together. “Let’s look at this mystery brother, then.”

Nothing had changed, and nothing Catarina did had any effect on him either. 

“I’m sorry, Magnus.” She straightened up after having checked the reflexes of his eyes. “I can’t say what is wrong with him, and from what you told me, I’d say it’s nothing concerning his body.”

“So we can only wait,” Magnus crossed his arms, then rubbed the thumb of one hand across his chin. 

Catarina rested one hand on his shoulder. “Give it a day or two. In the meantime, you can also look for someone who can treat that kind of trauma.”

They both looked at Phoenix’ face, and neither of them needed to mention that the damage might be irreparable.

* * *

Phoenix remained unconscious for several more days, kept alive by Catarina’s and Magnus’ magic. 

And during that time, Magnus kept asking himself why he already cared so much; he hardly knew this man, hadn’t talked to him more than three times altogether, but he was a soul in need of help. And the fact that he was Magnus’ brother only increased Magnus’ urge to help him, to fix him, to see him smile or hear him laugh. No matter that he was a stranger. He was his brother. And that was all that mattered. 

It was five days after the exorcism that Phoenix finally stirred, and Magnus, who thankfully happened to be present, watched his eyelids flutter with bated breath. Phoenix’ head dropped to the side, and a soft moan fell from his lips. His eyelids fluttered again, and then slowly opened. 

Magnus waited for another moment, when he could be sure Phoenix was really awake. “Hey,” he said softly.

Phoenix blinked a few times, and slowly and laboriously, turned his head. Magnus smiled and took one of his hands. 

“How do you feel?”

Phoenix stared at him for a moment with parted lips, and then he swallowed drily. “What happened?” He whispered, voice cracked from long disuse.

“What do you remember?” Magnus asked, voice still low.

But his brother just stared at him, and let his eyes flick back and forth across the room before they landed on his face again. “Who are you?”

Magnus closed his eyes and swallowed, but kept his smile in place. A temporary memory loss was nothing to be worried about after an exorcism. “You don’t remember?”

Phoenix shook his head. “What happened?” He asked again. “Where am I? And who are you?”

Magnus took a deep breath. “You are safe here, don’t worry. You are safe. Is there anything you remember at all?”

Closing his eyes with a frown, Phoenix let his head drop back. Magnus watched him with apprehension; while a short-term memory loss was common, in this case it was quite possible that everything that happened after the demonic possession was gone now. 

“I was eating bread,” Phoenix said suddenly and opened his eyes again, giving Magnus a confused, almost scared look. “With you. Who are you?”

Magnus felt relief wash through him and he sighed, but kept smiling. “I am your brother.”

“Brother?” Phoenix tried to push himself up, but had to give up because his arms couldn’t bear his weight. “I don’t have a...” He stared at nothing for a moment, then he took a deep, shaky breath. His eyes wandered back to Magnus’ face. “Magnus?”

Magnus gently squeezed Phoenix’ hand. “Magnus. I’m glad you remember. That means that the rest will surface too.”

“The rest?” Phoenix looked confused, and more than a little scared.

“You have been under a demonic possession,” Magnus said. “I took care of that, but it left you a little worse for wear.”

Phoenix stared at Magnus for what seemed like an eternity, his eyes slowly growing wider and wider. He swallowed audibly, and finally took a shaky breath. 

“What did I do,” he whispered, his voice flat with horror.

“Whatever happened wasn’t your fault, but the demon’s,” Magnus said calmly. “I could even see you fight it, but after such a long time the demon had a really good hold on you.”

“Time?” Phoenix swallowed hard again. “How...”

“My guess is that the possession happened shortly after our father cast you out.” Magnus narrowed his eyes a little, gauging his brother’s reaction, to see if he remembered any of that.

Phoenix let his head sink back into his pillow and closed his eyes. He was silent for a long moment, and suddenly a single tear fell from the corner of his right eye, the one Magnus could see. 

“I didn’t mean it,” he whispered huskily without opening his eyes. “It wasn’t your fault. I never wanted to hate you. Or hurt you.”

“I know,” Magnus replied gently. “I know. If you had ever been capable of such a hate, father wouldn’t have had any trouble to turn you into a prince of Edom.”

His eyes flying open, Phoenix held his breath for a moment. Then he turned his head again, and his eyes, red and glassy with tears, came to rest on Magnus’ face.

“Do you really think so?”

“Yes,” Magnus replied, and gently increased the pressure of his fingers around his brother’s hand. “And it breaks my heart to think about what he put you through because you didn’t want to succumb to evil.”

“But I tried,” Phoenix whispered, and another tear crept down his cheekbone into his hair. “I tried.”

“But you couldn’t.” Magnus voice was gentle and firm. “You are a good man, Phoenix. You have a good heart, and you paid a terrible price for it.”

Phoenix was silent for another moment, and tear after tear trickled from the corners of his eyes. “You really think so?” His voice was cracked and hardly audible.

“I do,” Magnus said and summoned a paper tissue to dab the tears away. “I honestly do.”

After a moment Phoenix closed his eyes again. His tears ebbed off, but the pressure of his fingers around Magnus’ hand didn’t relent yet. Magnus watched his face, so pale and so gaunt, the eyes deeply sunken and shadowed. He looked more dead than alive, but he didn’t suffer from a complete memory loss, which Magnus counted as a win. Maybe he wasn’t too broken after all. But he would still have to find someone who could actually help. 

And as soon as Phoenix had fallen asleep again, Magnus left his bedside to do exactly that. He had a few names by now, and it was time to make a few calls.


	8. Chapter 8

It took two more days before Phoenix was able to leave the bed on his own, and Magnus had hardly left his side during all the time. In fact, he was having a hard time leaving the apartment at all because being alone reduced Phoenix to a trembling bundle of fear. 

Magnus knew he really needed to set Phoenix up into professional treatment, but he wasn’t very successful. Confronted by Alec about that, he eventually had to admit that he wasn’t trying very hard because he didn’t want to scare Phoenix even more with strangers trying to prod around in his mind. Or face the possibility that Phoenix would have to stay somewhere else for an extended amount of time. 

But since he did neither of them a favour with being so hesitant about it he squared his shoulders and finally, sent the fire message he had been shirking for days. Once that was done he already felt as if a huge load was lifted off his shoulders. But now he had to break the news to his brother, who was in a fragile state of mind, to put it mildly. 

His bedroom was empty however, and Magnus eventually found him in the bathroom. He was staring at the mirror with a look in his eyes which told Magnus clearly that he wasn’t happy about what he saw. He leaned against the doorframe and crossed his arms. 

Since Phoenix had seen him approach in the mirror he didn’t flinch when Magnus asked: “Something wrong?”

Phoenix swallowed and shook his head.

Magnus pushed himself off the doorframe and entered the bathroom. “Why don’t you tell me what’s bothering you. Maybe I can help.”

Phoenix took a deep breath and licked his lips. “It’s...”

Magnus waited patiently.

“It’s... my eyes.”

“Ah.” Magnus stepped closer and to his brother’s side.

Their eyes met in the mirror, dark brown and golden with slit pupils. Of course, without magic Phoenix couldn’t glamour his eyes, and was reminded of Asmodeus’ stare every time he happened to look at his own reflection. 

“If you want,” Magnus began cautiously, “I can do something about that.”

Phoenix’ eyes widened. “You can?”

“I can cast a glamour over them, just like I do with my own.”

“And...” Phoenix bit his lower lip. “They would look like yours?”

“They would.”

Staring at his mirror image Phoenix took a few deep, shaky breaths. “Please,” he said eventually, his voice husky. “Magnus, can you... please?”

“Of course,” Magnus said gently and snapped his fingers to summon his magic. 

Casting the glamour only took two seconds, and Phoenix’ eyes widened almost comically when he looked in the mirror. His eyes were of the same brown now that Magnus’ eyes were, and it enhanced the resemblance between the brothers even more. Phoenix looked at his reflection no longer than a heartbeat before his eyes clouded over with tears. They ran down his cheek and he gripped the sink for support. 

“Thank you,” he said, almost choking on his tears. “Thank you... Magnus... thank you.”

“It’s okay,” Magnus replied. “It’s not a problem. I’m glad I could help. Make you feel better.”

“You... you saved me.” Phoenix slowly turned around. “You saved me, and you gave me a name and-”

“You chose that name, Phoenix,” Magnus interrupted him gently.

“But you helped.” His brother tried to smile. “And you let me into your home, and you... I can never repay you. I...”

“Phoenix.” Magnus rested one hand against his arm. “I don’t want any payment. You owe me nothing. I was glad to help.”

Phoenix managed a smile and wiped the back of his hand across his cheek, and followed Magnus out of the bathroom and into the kitchen. 

“Tea or coffee?” Magnus asked.

“I... I don’t know. What are you having?”

“Coffee,” Magnus replied. “Want some?”

Phoenix nodded eagerly. “I could make the coffee?”

“Don’t worry,” Magnus said, and tried to identify the slight feeling of unease. “Just get comfortable somewhere and I’ll be right there.”

Instead of getting comfortable somewhere however, Phoenix hovered at the doorway to the kitchen and first sat down when Magnus was sitting down as well. 

“Okay,” Magnus said then and cleared his throat. “Phoenix, I have to talk to you about something.”

His brother’s face immediately went white with fear. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No,” Magnus replied quickly. “Not at all. It’s just...” Then he sighed. “Look. I know that after all you’ve been through, you need someone to help you cope with it. And I am not really qualified to do that.”

Phoenix stared at him as if Magnus had told him he was to pack and move out within the hour. 

“Phoenix, I’m just saying you need more help than I can give you.”

“But... but I’m fine,” Phoenix replied, a trace of panic in his voice. “I’m fine! The demon is gone, right? I don’t want to kill you anymore!”

“I know.” Magnus took a deep breath. “I know. And that’s not the problem. I just think you need someone who can better help you get over the trauma.”

“But I’m fine...” Phoenix whispered, and tears welled up in his eyes. “I’m fine. Please don’t send me away.”

“Nobody is sending you away.” But Magnus knew in his heart that he might just have lied to his brother, because he was so unstable he might not be able to handle the truth right now. This was getting worse with every word. 

“Okay, I don’t want you to get stressed over that. It’s not going to happen anytime soon.” And because he couldn’t bear to be any more dishonest, he added: “I think.”

Phoenix pulled up his knees and slung his arms around them. And he kept looking at Magnus with his eyes wide in anxiety. 

Magnus had no idea how to handle this situation. Phoenix was practically glued to his side, and he was a mess every time Magnus had to leave the apartment. It was obvious that this situation wasn’t healthy for either of them, so that evening, after he had coaxed Phoenix to bed with the promise that he wouldn’t go anywhere, he sent another fire message.

* * *

The warlock in question portalled in from Johannesburg the very day shortly after noon. She was a large woman with an aura to match her size, her dress made of fabric with a colourful pattern. Large golden rings and earrings contrasted starkly with her dark skin. 

“Sura,” Magnus greeted her warmly. “I’m so glad you could make it.”

“From what you told me, it is a matter of urgency.”

“It is.” Magnus gestured towards his study. “After you.”

He discussed Phoenix and what he had gone through in detail with the other warlock, and Sura asked him to take Phoenix to Johannesburg later that day as she had a few things to prepare for them. Magnus thanked her profusely before she portalled home again, after greeting Phoenix with a warm smile. But as soon as she had gone Magnus closed his eyes and took a deep, deep breath. 

“Phoenix?” 

His brother, who had spent the time Magnus and Sura had been in his study curled up on the sofa, shot upright and looked at him with wide eyes. “Yes?”

“We are going to visit Sura later today.” He smiled encouragingly, but as expected, Phoenix curled up again and stared at him in blatant fear.

“You really don’t have to be afraid. Nobody is going to hurt you.”

His brother seemed unconvinced, however, and his anxiety got worse and worse the more the day progressed. And when Magnus announced, after having received a fire message from Sura, that they were good to go, he could hardly uncurl to leave the couch. Alec, who had just gotten home from work, gave him an encouraging smile, but Phoenix slunk past him and towards Magnus’ side like a beaten dog. 

Magnus had to take his hand to urge him through the portal.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I feel the need to apologize in advance for the pain. But everything will be okay. I did not add additional torture for Phoenix. No need to be scared.

As they emerged out of the portal into Sura’s home in Johannesburg, Sura greeted them with one of her warm and welcoming smiles and offered some tea and baked goods. Phoenix mutely shook his head and looked around as if he expected to be banished back to Edom any moment. 

It was one of Sura’s cats that finally tore him out of his almost-catatonic state, and he lowered himself down onto the carpet where he was immediately put into service as a pillow by the purring feline. 

“She knows when someone is in need of comfort,” Sura said in a low voice to Magnus, a smile on her lips. “He is in good hands.”

“Or paws, as it were,” Magnus replied with a soft smile on his own. Phoenix was absolutely enthralled by the large, beautiful Maine Coon. 

Sura took Magnus aside towards the other end of the room. “I can see he is in a very bad place,” she said then. “But he insists he is fine, doesn’t he?”

“He does,” Magnus replied in a heavy voice. “But he... he...”

“Can’t let you out of his sight?”

Magnus tore his eyes away from his brother and looked at Sura, who had a sad and knowing smile on her face. 

“You are his saviour,” she said simply. “You rescued him from hell, a literal hell he has carried around with him for centuries. And now he is lost, afraid, adrift, and he latched on to you as the only lodestone in his life that he has.”

Not knowing what to reply, Mangus could only helplessly met her eyes.

“It is going to be hard for him,” Sura went on. “Very hard. Because if he is ever to heal, and become his own man again, lead his own life, then he has to do so away from you.”

Magnus paled. “Forever?”

“No.” Sura shook her head with a gentle smile, making the sunlight dance on her large earrings in bright spots. “But for as long as necessary. Until he is truly himself, truly stable, truly independent. But with you around, he will not be able to let go.”

Not that Magnus hadn’t expected it, but it was hard to think about, nonetheless. Phoenix would be heartbroken, he would panic, he would cry, and he...

“You are affected by this as well,” Sura tore him out of his train of thoughts. “You both need the distance now.”

“I am unable to digress,” Magnus said and looked at his brother, and back at her. “So, what do we do?”

“You leave him here with me.”

“What, now?”

“Yes.” Her voice was gentle, but firm. “Telling him he has to live with me for a time, and then taking him back home with you in the knowledge he isn’t to stay will make things a lot worse.”

Magnus was, again, unable to digress. “So we have to do it here, I assume?”

“Yes.” Sura looked at Phoenix who was hugging the purring cat, his nose buried in her fur. 

“But are you sure of that? Isn’t that too big a strain?”

“If you want him to heal and become a new man as a warlock, then yes, it has to be done now. How long do you need to prepare?”

Magnus looked at his brother with a sad smile, and back at the other warlock. “I have the ritual and the spell memorized for a while now. I don’t need any more preparation.”

“Good. Then let us not waste any more time.”

Magnus squared his shoulders and took a deep breath, and they headed back across the room where Phoenix was still sitting on the carpet with the purring cat in his lap that was busily kneading his thighs with her forepaws. 

“Phoenix?” Magnus asked cautiously, but his brother flinched anyway.

He anxiously looked up with hunched shoulders. “Yes?”

Magnus gestured at him to get up, and Phoenix only reluctantly let go of the cat to get onto his feet. 

“Phoenix,” Sura said, her deep voice gentle. “Do not be afraid of me. I am here to help you.”

“But I am fine,” Phoenix said again, although he looked everything but.

“Are you not always afraid?”

“Not when Magnus is here,” he replied and cast his brother a look of adoration.

“And what if he can’t be there?”

“But...” Phoenix looked back and forth between the two, and his face slowly drained of all colour. “But...”

“Phoenix,” Sura said again. “We want to help you get better, so you don’t have to be afraid even if Magnus isn’t there. So you will stay here with me for a while, and I will help you.”

Phoenix slung his arms around his chest and stared at his feet. It was like talking to a scared, little child. 

Sura took a deep breath. “We can start making you feel better with giving you your magic back, how is that?”

At that, Phoenix’ head flew up again, and his eyes went wide, but not in fear this time. “You can do that?”

“I can,” Magnus said with a smile. “And it won’t even take that long. And I promise it won’t hurt. It’s not going to be overly pleasant, but it won’t hurt.”

The process in question was rather simple in itself. Making the transfusion permanent was a different matter altogether, but the fact that he and Phoenix shared the same demonic magic through their father made things infinitely easier. It wouldn’t be pleasant for either of them; Magnus would be drained of all his power and would need several days to recover from this. But it was a price he was more than willing to pay to make things right for his brother. 

But for something so momentous, the act in itself was ridiculously unspectacular. A chant while Magnus took Phoenix’ hands in his, and the transfer in itself a surge of light paralysing and enveloping them both. And then the light vanished, and Magnus took a step back. He needed all his strength of will to remain upright, but he didn’t want to worry his brother at all costs.

Tears streaming down his face, Phoenix stared at his hands that were encased in the blue, silvery light of magic, magic he had been born with, that had been a part of him, a part he hadn’t felt for centuries. He was sobbing like a child. 

Then he looked up at Magnus, and after taking a step forward he fell to his knees before him and clamped his arms around Magnus’ midriff, sobbing into his shirt while breathlessly stammering out an endless string of _thank you, thank you Magnus, thank you..._

“Phoenix, don’t.” Magnus felt more than uncomfortable and tried to step back to free himself from the embrace. “Please get up.”

It took his brother a while to let go again however, and when he managed to get onto his feet he looked at Magnus with wide, tear-filled eyes as if he was having a vision from god.

And if Magnus had needed any more proof that he had to temporarily vanish out of his brother’s life to enable him to heal and re-build himself, it was that.

“It is time now, Magnus,” Sura said then, and opened a portal. 

“Magnus?” Phoenix’ smile vanished and his breathing picked up speed. “You... you’re coming back, right?” He looked at Sura, and his voice was suddenly laced with fear. “You won’t leave me alone here, will you?”

Magnus closed his eyes and took a deep, heavy breath. “I have to,” he said. “Sura will be able to help you better than I ever could. But I can’t stay here.”

Phoenix looked as if Magnus had slapped his face. “But you can’t leave me,” he whispered, voice flat with horror. “You can’t... Magnus you can’t leave me.”

“I have to,” Magnus said, trying to hide his own anguish. “But you have Sura to help you. You will understand in time.”

“But I can’t...” Phoenix was beginning to shake. “You can’t leave me!”

“I have to,” Magnus said again, as gently as he could. “But it’s not forever. And I have a gift for you before I go.”

“Magnus, don’t go,” Phoenix whispered in a cracked, strained voice. “Don’t go. Please don’t go...”

Magnus slipped his hand into the inner pocket of his coat and produced a small, silver pendant on a silver chain. It was round and polished, engraved with a collection of dots connected by several lines. 

“Here,” he said and held the pendant out to Phoenix who reached out and took it hesitantly before looking at the engraving in puzzlement.

“Magnus...?”

“It’s the constellation of Phoenix,” Magnus said with as much of a smile as he could muster. “Don’t forget it was you who chose that name. Be proud of it.”

He took a step back, and another towards the portal. 

“Magnus,” Phoenix whispered again. “You can’t leave me.”

“Phoenix, I have to. Do you trust me?”

After a moment, Phoenix nodded hesitantly.

“Then I need you to trust me now,” Magnus said. “This is how it has to be. Sura will take care of you much better than I can.”

“But... But you promised.” Phoenix looked at him in fear and betrayal, and it was like a punch to the guts. “Magnus you promised... every step of the way, you promised... you promised!” Tears were running down his cheeks again. “Don’t leave me, Magnus! You promised!”

“I know.” Magnus shook his head. “But I didn’t know I wouldn’t be able to. I’m so sorry, Phoenix, but I can’t. I can’t stay here with you. You have to go the next steps without me, but you won’t be going alone. Sura will be with you.”

“But she’s not you! I need you, Magnus!”

“And that is the whole point of this.” Magnus was using all his strength to keep his voice calm. “You’re not supposed to need me. You’re supposed to live your life and rely on yourself and your own strength. And that doesn’t mean you can’t be with me. But you can’t... need me. That’s just wrong.”

He took another step towards the portal, and then looked back at Phoenix who stood there, ashen-faced and crying, the pendant clutched in his hand so hard his knuckles were white. Sura stepped beside him and rested one hand firmly on his shoulder.

“Go,” she said to Magnus. “Every second is making it worse.”

“Magnus!”

Magnus nodded and turned away.

“MAGNUS!!”

He had to grit his teeth as he stepped through the portal, the cry of anguish echoing in his ears as he emerged in his apartment. 

He didn’t register Alec’s presence, not until he was at his side and slung both arms around him. Magnus buried into Alec’s warm embrace with a sigh that was close to a sob. 

“You going to be okay?” Alec asked softly.

“Eventually,” Magnus whispered. “I... it wasn’t easy.”

In fact, it had been one of the hardest things Magnus had ever done. Even knowing that it was the only way made him feel horrible for breaking the promise he had made. He could only hope that Phoenix would forgive him.

But he knew that Phoenix’ last and despairing scream of his name would haunt him for a long time.

* * *


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a lot longer than the others, but I couldn't find the right place to cut it. Enjoy!

_-Eleven months later-_

“So, when did you last hear about your brother?” Izzy asked before taking another spoonful of the Paella. 

“Last month,” Magnus replied and took his glass, taking a sip of the Spanish Rosé they had ordered. 

The dinner in Barcelona – which at local time was lunch, of course – had been Alec’s idea, and because Magnus was never one to refuse an interesting little trip around the world for a change of scenery, or rather, food, had portalled the Lightwood siblings, Jace, and Clary to Spain without hesitation. 

“How long has he been in Johannesburg again?” Jace asked after shovelling some of the family-sized Paella into his mouth. 

“The better part of a year,” Magnus replied and looked at his plate. “I got regular updates from Sura but they never went into any more detail than ‘he is doing well and making good progress’ or ‘he has learned another spell’, and while I really would like to check on him myself, I know why I shouldn’t.”

“Still?” Clary tilted her head. “After all that time?”

“I have to trust Sura’s judgement.” Magnus took another, rather large sip of wine. “She’s the expert here.” But then he sighed. “Of course I keep asking myself what kind of man he’s becoming. I guess I have to wait and see.”

Izzy and Alec exchanged a look, and while Izzy smiled Alec proceeded to shovel Paella into his mouth, making it momentarily impossible to partake in the conversation.

The place around them began to fill, and they decided not to stay longer after they had finished their dinner because the place was so busy. Magnus said that other people should have a chance to enjoy the food as well, and Izzy then suggested they could let the evening end with a few cocktails. 

“I don’t really feel like partying in a club somewhere,” Alec said and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket. 

“Come on, _hermano_ ,” Izzy said and slipped her arm through one of his. “We don’t have to go partying.” And then she looked at Magnus, and smiled even wider. “Maybe Magnus is in the mood for sharing a few of his famous cocktails?”

Magnus looked at her and shook his head with a smile. “There will come a day when I will be able to resist that look in a Lightwood’s eye, but it is not this day.” He winked before elegantly opening a portal.

“Duly noted,” Izzy replied and winked back. 

But as they stepped out of the portal into the loft, Magnus froze and looked around. 

“Why is my apartment full of people?”

“Surprise party,” Izzy said with the brightest smile. 

“And is that why you talked me into having dinner in Barcelona?”

“Well, we couldn’t throw you a surprise party with you sitting on the couch sipping bourbon,” Clary said with a bright grin. 

“And what is the occasion, if I may ask?” Magnus turned to face Alec. “Because as far as I’m aware it’s nobody’s birthday.”

“No,” Alec said pointedly and looked past Magnus across the living area.

Magnus turned around and followed his gaze, but found nothing out of the ordinary. A handful of people – warlocks whom he knew well plus Luke, Maia and Simon. 

And a tall and lean guy who was wearing vintage brown leather jeans and a black tank top that revealed parts of a large, colourful tattoo which seemed to cover his whole back. He wore his long black hair in an undercut, the long part at the top thrown into a messy bun. He was talking with Catarina, his back to Magnus. 

Magnus was pretty sure he had never met anyone with that sort of tattoo. But then he felt his pulse picking up speed and he turned around again to find two Lightwoods, one Herondale, and a Fairchild smirking at him. He slowly looked back at Catarina and her conversation partner.

Catarina noticed him the same moment, looking past the man she was talking to, and said something to him that Magnus didn’t catch. 

The stranger turned around, and Magnus’ breath caught in his throat; he wasn’t even aware he started walking, not before he stood directly in front of him. The silver pendant around his neck caught the light for a moment, the only piece of jewellery he was wearing, and Magnus lifted his eyes from his chest to his face. 

He had filled out nicely, his arms shapely muscled in a wiry sort of way, and his face was no longer gaunt and pale. And now Magnus could easily see the strong resemblance to his own reflection in the unexpectedly handsome face. He was rendered speechless. 

“Phoenix?” He was eventually able to say, and even that sounded rather unsteady

“Surprise,” Phoenix replied, a slightly nervous smile on his face. 

The two brothers looked at each other for a long, almost awkward moment, before Phoenix shifted his weight from one foot to the other. 

That tore Magnus out of his stupor. “I...” He gestured helplessly into the air. “Wow. I don’t know what to say. You look...” he groped for words for a few moments and then settled for “...good,” even if that was a huge understatement. 

“Thanks.” Phoenix’ smile went from nervous to bashful. “I’ve been working on it.”

“I can see that,” Magnus said, still stumped. “Um... wow. You and Sura sure did a damn good job.”  
“Yeah, it wasn’t easy,” Phoenix replied, pressing his lips together for a moment. “I was that close to giving up, a lot of times, but Sura didn’t let me.”

“It was worth it, though.” Magnus took a deep breath and smiled.

“Yes.” It was a simple statement, a single word, but it carried more weight than several sentences.

Magnus looked his brother up and down again, and his eyes got caught on the pendant for a moment, a stark contrast of stainless steel on the black fabric of the tank top. 

“Actually,” Phoenix began somewhat hesitantly, “I wanted to thank you.”

“You have nothing to thank me for,” Magnus said firmly. “I only did what was right.”

“Maybe, but...” Phoenix shrugged, and looked down for a moment, and while he crossed his arms now, it didn’t look like he was hugging his chest to protect himself. “I mean, one of the first things I said to you was that I wanted to kill you.” He looked up again, and met Magnus’ eyes. “And with the state I was in, nobody would have blamed you if you had just handed me over to the Clave to be put into an asylum somewhere. But you didn’t only see a possessed madman. You saw your brother, and you took me in, and cared for me, and in the end you cared enough to find someone to help me so I could... heal. Become myself again. And... yeah. I’m grateful you gave me that chance.” He dropped his arms again. 

“I...” Magnus was still groping for words. “I can’t even say how happy I am to see you like this.” 

“It’s...” Phoenix shrugged. “It’s not perfect. Sura said there are deeper levels of my subconsciousness that even her mind magic can’t reach, not without wiping the slate totally blank and re-programming me from scratch. She even offered, when...” He closed his eyes for a second. “It was bad and... but I didn’t want it.” When he opened his eyes, they were misting over. “I would have forgotten father and everything he did, but I would also have forgotten you, and I didn’t want that. I wanted to hang on to you, and everything you did for me.”

Magnus swallowed hard, and his vision blurred as well. “Oh god,” he muttered. “Phoenix, I...”

Catarina stepped away from them, but as she passed Magnus she leaned a little closer. “This is the part where you should hug,” she muttered into his ear before she left them. 

Magnus huffed out a shaky chuckle and looked at his brother’s face. Phoenix was clenching and unclenching his fists, blinking furiously against the moisture clinging to his lashes. Then they simultaneously stepped forward and slung their arms around each other.

“I’ll never be able to thank you enough,” Phoenix muttered into Magnus’ hair after a moment. “I...” He almost choked on the tears he was fighting.

“Phoenix...”

“Don’t worry, I won’t fall to my knees,” Phoenix replied with a shaky, breathless chuckle. “But I would burn down the world for you.”

Magnus loosened the embrace and leaned back, but kept his hands on his brother’s shoulders. “It’s appreciated but not necessary, since I’m a powerful warlock and can do that myself if needs be.”

Phoenix smiled at him, but it was a true smile, a warm smile full of affection but without the mindless adoration that had been in his eyes before. 

“Yeah, but I found out I am too, actually. Powerful, I mean. It’s... my father is a greater demon and a prince of hell. Of course I’d be powerful, even if I’m not nearly as powerful as you. I just never had the chance to realise that before.”

Magnus’ smile widened. “I knew that. And I was hoping you would, too.” Then he took a deep breath. “So... how is the magic training coming along?”

Looking across the room Phoenix’ eyes fell on Sura who had been watching them with a satisfied smile. She took that as a cue to join them and looked up at Phoenix with pride. 

“He is doing well,” she said. “And he seems to have a special affinity for healing magic. That must have been one of the reasons your father was so hard on him.”

“Doubtlessly,” Magnus replied and looked at his brother again. “I’m sure you and Catarina will get along splendidly.” Then he looked back at Sura and took a deep breath. “Thank you. This is better than what I even dared to hope for.”

“Yes, he can be proud of himself,” Sura said with a fond smile. “It was hard in the beginning of course, and sometimes the only thing that kept him going was wanting to make you proud, Magnus. Less than optimal, but it was a foundation I could work with. And once he reached the stage where he wanted to make himself proud, that’s when the real progress began.”

They both looked at Phoenix who shoved his hands into his pocket and stared at his feet, shoulders a little hunched, but with a slightly embarrassed smile on his face.

“Come on Phoenix, you are allowed to be proud of yourself.” Magnus nudged his brother’s arm with his fist. “What you accomplished is enormous.”

“It’s not as if I did that alone,” Phoenix replied and cast a look at Sura.

“No, of course not.” Magnus squeezed Phoenix’ arm. “But the fact that you had help doesn’t mean what you accomplished is worth any less. Without help, you would still be... um...”

“A gibbering mess,” Phoenix finished for him. 

“A gibbering mess,” Magnus conceded.

Their eyes met, and they both snorted. Phoenix wiped the back of his hand across his cheeks. After a moment, Magnus took a smell step back, but the smile on his face didn’t dim. 

“Let me introduce you,” he said and gestured at Phoenix to follow. “But I guess you have met most of the people here by now.”

“Sort of,” Phoenix replied as he fell in step next to Magnus. “Talked to a few but not really more than exchanging names.”

“And you have met Alec,” Magnus said as they had reached the four people who had distracted Magnus so effectively. “My significant other.”

“Yes.” Phoenix tried to square his shoulders. 

“Hey Phoenix,” Alec said and offered his hand. “Good to have you back.”

“Thanks.” Phoenix took the offered hand. “It’s good to be...” He broke off with a lopsided smile. “I haven’t been really here before, so I can’t really be back, can I?”

“But you’re staying, aren’t you?” Izzy held out her hand to him. “Hey, I’m Isabelle, I’m Alec’s sister.”

“Hey,” Phoenix said and took her hand as well. 

“And that’s Jace,” Magnus said and pointed at the man in question. “And his girlfriend Clary. And you already met Simon, I assume.” Simon, who was standing next to Izzy, smiled and nodded.

“Nice to finally meet you,” Jace said and firmly shook Phoenix’ hand. “So what are your plans?”

Phoenix shoved his hands into his pockets and shrugged. “I didn’t really have any plans yet,” he said, somewhat hesitantly. “I mean... I may technically be a few hundred years older than Magnus, but I’m actually just a fledgling warlock. I got no job, no resources, no place to stay. I don’t even have a phone, so... I really just have to find my feet first.”

“But you have a family,” Izzy said with a smile. 

“And a promise,” Magnus added and smiled at his brother. “I couldn’t keep my word, but I sure won’t take it back. Every step of the way, from here on.”

Phoenix returned the smile, his eyes going soft. “Thank you.”

“So, are you moving to New York, then?” Simon asked eagerly. “That would be so cool, I mean, we won’t only have one, but two Banes in Brooklyn. Like, Bane and Bane? Or the Bane Brothers?”

Phoenix snorted so hard he had to wipe the back of his hand across his upper lip, and his laugh sounded halfway between a chuckle and a giggle.

“Don’t tell me you get that reference,” Simon said, thrusting his forefinger at Phoenix. “Seriously?”

“I read a lot of books and I watched a lot of movies to get familiar with this world, and this era.” And then he grinned at Simon. “So yeah, I get the reference, though I doubt that Magnus would willingly wear a fedora.”

“I beg your pardon,” Magnus said indignantly. “I can absolutely rock a fedora.”

But before Simon could engage Phoenix into a nerd-monologue with audience, Magnus raised his voice and loudly asked for silence. 

“A toast!” Then he turned towards his brother who had slightly glowing patches on his cheeks. “To friends and family!”

The words were echoed across the apartment, and after taking a sip of his drink, Magnus stepped closer to Phoenix and rested one hand on his brother’s shoulders. “You’re more than welcome to stay here, for as long as you need. We get you set up and established.”

“I...” Phoenix took a deep breath. “Thank you.” Then he looked at Alec. “If that’s okay with you?”

“Why shouldn’t it be?” Alec smiled at him. “You’re my brother-in-law. You’re more than welcome here.”

“Thank you,” Phoenix said again, and dug the heel of his hand in one eye, then the other. “I just don’t know how to thank you all.”

“That’s what family is for,” Simon said and smiled even broader at him. “I mean, you are Magnus’ family, of course but... wait, are you actually a Bane?”

“I...” Phoenix cast his brother a slightly helpless look. “Didn’t you choose that name for yourself?”

“I did,” Magnus replied, “but that doesn’t mean I can’t share it with you. If you want it, that is. You can be a Bane, if you want.”

Phoenix stared at him for a moment, then he swallowed hard and took a shaky breath. “Phoenix Bane?” His voice was trembling.

“It has a certain ring to it, doesn’t it?” Magnus replied gently and handed Alec his glass. 

He took a step forward and opened his arms, and Phoenix didn’t hesitate a second. They embraced firmly, and for a long time. When they finally let go Magnus had to conjure a tissue for his brother so he could wipe his eyes and blow his nose, but once he had slipped the soiled tissue into his pocket, Phoenix was smiling again. 

“That looks like a cool tattoo on your back, by the way,” Jace said, and leaned a little to the side to get a glimpse of Phoenix’ back.

“Yeah, I’m quite proud of that one.” Phoenix chuckled. “Even if I didn’t make it myself. “But I... um... I can show it off a little, right?” With that he pulled the tank top over his head and turned around to present his back to the others. 

For a moment, no one knew what to say. It was a colourful, breathtakingly beautiful picture of a Phoenix rising from his own ashes, covering his whole back from shoulders to hips, and the vibrant colours and craftsmanship almost made the whole scene look alive. But it wasn’t just a beautiful and meaningful picture meant to cover the scars on Phoenix’ back. The whole tattoo seemed to have been drawn around them, the irregular ridges of scars being a part of the motive, some as lines and shadows in the bird, some as veins of lightning in the background. Instead of being hidden, the scars had been incorporated into the picture.

“That’s...” Clary huffed out an incredulous little chuckle as Phoenix pulled his tank top back on. “It’s beautiful.”

“Yeah, it helps when the tattoo artist is a warlock too,” Phoenix replied and smiled. “It turned out exactly the way I wanted.”

“But it doesn’t really hide the scars, does it?” Jace asked cautiously.

“No, it doesn’t.” Phoenix calmly met his eyes. “And it wasn’t supposed to. The scars are part of what I am.”

Izzy raised her glass. “Phoenix Bane, a New York warlock.”

“I drink to that,” Magnus said and knocked back his Martini. “So, as the high warlock of Brooklyn, it is my privilege and pleasure to welcome you to the New York warlock community, Phoenix. And as your brother...” He huffed out a sigh, a warm smile on his face. “Welcome home, Phoenix.”

They embraced again, and didn’t let go of each other for a long time.


	11. Chapter 11

After the last guests had taken their leave, Phoenix and Sura made an emotional farewell before Phoenix summoned his few belongings. He watched the portal close behind her with crossed arms and a thoughtful frown. 

Magnus stepped beside him and rested a hand on his shoulder. “Hmm?”

Phoenix looked at him and smiled. “Feels a little strange. I mean... I always knew I’d move out again, but I wasn’t sure I’d ever live in New York. I didn’t just want to assume you’d take me in.”

“Given the circumstances, I can’t blame you,” Magnus replied with a smile of his own. “But when I said you’re welcome to stay as long as you need, I meant it.”

“Thank you,” Phoenix replied and took a deep breath. “For everything.”

“No need to go there again,” Magnus said and patted Phoenix’ shoulder. “Why don’t you get settled, get some sleep, and tomorrow we can talk about the future.”

“Sounds good.” Phoenix picked up the large duffle bag. “I’m beat.”

“Then I hope you have a good night in your new home.”

Phoenix’ smile wavered and he bit his lower lip. “Thanks.”

“Good night.”

“Good night, Magnus.”

* * *

When Magnus entered the kitchen the next morning, Alec was explaining the coffee maker to his brother. 

“He can just conjure up some coffee, you know?” Magnus winked when the two looked up at him.

“The point of this coffee maker,” Alec replied, “is that we have a way to make coffee the mundane way. And in case you wonder, he asked.”

Phoenix smiled. “Morning. Yes, I did. I like not having to rely on magic for everything.”

“Then you’re wiser than I was your age.” Magnus snapped his fingers and pointedly conjured himself a coffee.

“My age?” Phoenix snorted. “I’m technically four hundred years older.”

“Technically yes, but you said yourself you’re only a fledgling,” Magnus said brightly. “And thus I gladly take the role of older brother in terms of life experience.”

“Does that mean I have to annoy you with teenage escapades?”

“I had no idea you are so petty,” Magnus huffed in mock annoyance.

Phoenix shook his head with a grin and took the mug of freshly brewed coffee from the machine. He deeply inhaled the fragrance, then snapped his fingers and stirred the coffee with a spark of magic before taking a large sip. 

“Hey, I thought no magic coffee,” Alec said.

“I said I’ll _make_ the coffee the mundane way.” Phoenix inclined his head. “Doesn’t mean I have to drink it the mundane way. Why wait until it’s cooled when I can have it now?”

“Warlocks,” Alec muttered under his breath and took his own mug. 

“So,” Magnus said after they had settled around the breakfast table. “What are the plans for today?”

“Actually,” Alec hurried to say before Phoenix could reply, “I have a request, Phoenix.”

“Okay?” Phoenix put his mug down.

“I need you to come to the Institute for a debriefing about the portal that brought you here. The portal from Edom.”

Phoenix exhaled with puffed cheeks. “I don’t really remember a lot, and not even all that clear. The only thing I remember for sure is that after passing through I ended up in a crypt. Somewhere in Europe, because after ambling around for a few years I crossed the Atlantic as a crew member of a freight ship. But everything else from that time is really blurry.”

“A crypt in Europe,” Magnus said with a sigh. 

“Yeah, I know. Not a lot to work with.” Phoenix sighed as well and stared at his plate. “I’m sorry.”

Alec sighed as well, and dropped his napkin onto his plate. “Right. Gotta to the Institute. See you later.”

Moments later the door fell shut behind him, and Phoenix looked up at his brother with an unhappy frown. “Did I do something wrong?”

“Nothing.” Magnus shook his head for emphasis. “If anyone is to blame for that mood it’s me. He was... not happy when he realised that I hadn’t tried to get some information regarding the portal out of you, before dropping you off in Johannesburg.”

“Oh.” Phoenix bit his lips and stared at his plate. “I didn’t realise.”

“Alexander is a Shadowhunter and the head of the Institute, and he takes his job very seriously. But sometimes...” Magnus hesitated, and gestured at Alec’s empty plate, “sometimes he doesn’t pause to think about anything else. Yes, I know the portal was and is important. But I couldn’t just go and dig around in your memories, not in the state you were in.”

Phoenix nodded, but the deep lines in his forehead didn’t vanish. He remained lost in thought even as Magnus cleared the table, and after taking care of everything in the kitchen, Magnus found him staring out of the window across the balcony.

“Are you okay?” He asked cautiously. 

Phoenix didn’t reply, and crossed his arms a little tighter. 

“Phoenix?”

After a moment, Phoenix turned around to look at Magnus. He was gritting his teeth and there was a war going on behind his eyes Magnus had no means to understand. 

“Magnus,” he said eventually. “I have to go to the Institute. I need to speak with Alec.”

“Did you remember something?” Magnus put down his mug.

“No.” Phoenix squared his shoulders, but the deep-seated discomfort remained in his eyes. “But I... I need to speak with him.”

“Now?”

“Yes.”

Magnus snapped his fingers and adjusted his wardrobe from comfortable to presentable. “Would you like me to come along?”

“Sure,” Phoenix said and tried to smile. “If you don’t have anything better to do.”

“You look like you could use some emotional support,” Magnus said, without smiling. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Phoenix looked at him for a moment before he huffed out a chuckle under his breath. His shoulders relaxed and he nodded. 

“I’m okay. I just... I think I know how I can help. I can’t promise anything, but if it works, then... I’m going to try.”

“You look as if Sura wouldn’t approve,” Magnus said drily and cocked one eyebrow.

“Maybe not,” Phoenix replied and buttoned up the lower half of the dark, olive green denim shirt he had shrugged on over the black tank top this morning. “But I get how important that is. I don’t want any inhabitant of Edom popping up for an unannounced visit either.”

As they were about to step through the portal Magnus looked his brother up and down again. He himself was every inch the High Warlock of Brooklyn in black silk and black brocade, while his brother was wearing vintage leather jeans, a dark green denim shirt, and a black leather coat that reached his ankles. 

“Ashamed of your little brother’s fashion style?” Phoenix asked with a wry little smirk. 

“No,” Magnus replied with a twitch of his head. “It... suits you.”

“Thanks.” Phoenix rolled his shoulders. “It has taken me ages to figure it out.”

“And you’re looking great.” Magnus winked. “I mean you’re my brother. It’s in the genes.”

“And not even a bad taste in wardrobe can disfigure a... Bane?”

“I didn’t say you have a bad taste.” Magnus thrust out his forefinger. “To be honest, I’m having difficulties picturing you in most of my clothes.”

Phoenix shook his head with a grin, and stepped through the portal. Magnus followed a second later, and took the lead once they had arrived in the Institute.


	12. Chapter 12

Alec was understandably surprised to see the two warlocks stride into his office. 

“Magnus?” He looked up from his paperwork. “Phoenix? Something wrong?”

Magnus looked pointedly at his brother.

“Do you remember?” Alec asked and immediately got up.

“No,” Phoenix replied and closed his eyes for a second. “But I... I might be able to.”

Alec frowned and crossed his arms. “You... might?”

Phoenix walked past him to stare into the fireplace. He shrugged off the heavy coat and dropped it onto the couch, then he sighed and crossed his arms.

“Sura didn’t only heal me with mundane therapy tools,” he said after a long pause. “She has mastered mind magic like no other warlock, but... she only uses it to help people.”

“As every strain of magic,” Magnus said and pressed the tips of his fingers together. “You can use it for good or bad.”

Phoenix nodded. “Anyway, she taught me spells that... that banish flashbacks and nightmares back into my memories where they belong.” He swallowed. “And I think if I reverse that spell and look in the right place, I might be able to dig a memory out instead of putting it back in.”

Alec crossed his arms, his eyebrows drawing together. “That can’t be pleasant. Are you sure you can do it?”

“I don’t know,” Phoenix said simply and met his eyes. “But I know how important this issue is, so I’m willing to try.”

“And will it have any side effects?” Alec took a step towards him. “I really appreciate it, but I don’t want to cause you any more trauma.”

As an answer, Phoenix just shrugged. 

Alec exchanged a long, slightly worried look with Magnus who shrugged as well. 

“I think Phoenix is the only one who can determine the chances of it working, and if the risk is worth it.” Magnus looked at his brother. “But you won’t hurt yourself, will you?”

“I don’t think so,” Phoenix replied, a deep frown on his face. “But I really... I keep thinking of the possibility of a greater demon just marching into this realm, and without a summoning, or a portal signature, there’s no way of discovering its presence. Or even a bunch of lesser demons. It’s...” He emitted an angry huff. “The Shadowhunters aren’t the only ones who care about protecting this world. There are lives at stake. I want that thing gone, even if it saved my life.”

Magnus and Alec exchanged another long look before Magnus nodded.

“Okay,” Alec said then. “What do you need?”

Phoenix sucked at his lips for a moment. “I just need to sit down somewhere and... try. I don’t know how this works. I... I’ll have to wing it, I guess.”

Alec nodded and closed his office door while Phoenix sat down on the couch. He exuded an air of both fear and determination, but he was able to give Magnus a faint smile when the latter sat down on his right side. 

“Tell me if there is anything I can do,” Magnus said in a low voice.

Phoenix nodded and took a few deep, slow breaths. The lines on his forehead deepened as he pinched his eyes shut, but after a moment, he opened them again. He looked up, very slowly, and turned his head to look at his brother. It was hardly there, and almost embarrassed, questioning smile, and he very hesitantly turned his right hand so it was resting palm upward on his thigh. Magnus didn’t miss a beat and took that hand firmly between his own. Phoenix’ smile warmed a little before he closed his eyes again.

For several minutes, nothing happened. 

And then suddenly Phoenix’ eyes flew open, flashing gold, the slit pupil widening. He gasped, and with parted lips he took a few shaky, shallow breaths. His legs were twitching slightly, and he flinched a few times while his breathing coming faster and faster. 

And then he froze, his widening even more. And as he slowly lifted his head to look at the ceiling, tears were spilling from his eyes and running down his cheeks. 

Neither Magnus nor Alec didn’t dare to breathe too hard. It was difficult to look at that face; Magnus remembered all too well when Phoenix had spoken about the starlit sky that had told him he was free. To see him like that... the moment must have been so earth-shattering no words could ever describe it.

Then Phoenix’ head fell forward, and he twitched, and he gasped, and then he took a shaky breath that sounded too much like a sob for Magnus’ liking. Then his head flew up again with a sharp intake of breath. 

“Paper,” he whispered hoarsely, still staring at nothing.

Alec almost fell over his feet in his haste to get to his desk, and he hurried towards the couch with a few blank sheets in his hand.

Blue magic shimmered around Phoenix’ right hand, and an image appeared on the first sheet. A graveyard, and a small mausoleum that had to be the entrance to the crypt. Alec dropped the picture and offered another sheet that he shoved under Phoenix’ hovering hand. The next picture was the skyline of a city. It wasn’t very detailed, but there was a large church right in the centre. The third picture was one of a street, with cars parked at the side.

Phoenix’ hand dropped, and he suddenly doubled over with a hoarse groan. 

“Phoenix!” Magnus grabbed his shoulders to pull him upright. “Stay with me!”

“I’m fine,” Phoenix muttered and straightened up, but leaned against Magnus’ shoulder for support. His eyes flashed back to brown. “I’m okay. I’m just... drained. I... I’m okay.”

Alec picked up the pictured to look at them. “They’re very dark,” he remarked with a frown.

“It was night,” Phoenix replied and closed his eyes. “I’m sorry. It’s the best I can do.”

“No, don’t apologise,” Alec said quickly. “This is so much more than we had before.”

Magnus picked the picture of the street out of Alec’s hand. He looked at the cars, held the picture closer to his face, and narrowed his eyes. 

“There.” He pointed at a number plate. “There, see that symbol? That number plate is somewhere from the European Union.” He narrowed his eyes and brought it a little closer. “I think it’s Italian, but I can’t say for sure.”

“We’ll have a look at it,” Alec said and took the picture back. “Phoenix, do you need anything?”

Phoenix opened his eyes again. “Just some water, please.”

“I take care of him,” Magnus said and gestured towards the door. “You take care of that.”

Magnus had been deeply worried about how forcefully digging through his memories might affect his brother, but against his expectations, Phoenix was surprisingly composed. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asked anyway.

“I am.” Phoenix gave him a tired smile. “I’m... I’m used to confronting memories, honestly. I just haven’t consciously dug them out before. I usually put them back.”

“You look battered.” Magnus summoned a glass of water from the drinks cart.

“I’ll be fine.” Phoenix accepted the glass. “It wasn’t one of my worst memories, after all.”

Which was a pretty good point. It was the moment Phoenix had found his freedom, leaving the demonic realm of Edom behind for good. So maybe it would really not be as bad as he had feared.

Magnus conjured up some coffee, and the brothers proceeded to wait for Alec and whatever news he might have. Magnus could only hope that Phoenix hadn’t put himself through that kind of ordeal for nothing. 

But when Alec entered his office again, he had a satisfied smile on his face.

“It was Italy,” Alec said to Magnus. “And that of course narrowed the search down significantly. We have the skyline identified, and a possible location.”

“So where do we have to go?” Magnus asked.

“Rome.” Alec looked at Phoenix with an appreciative smile. “And we have two graveyards where you can find a building like this one. We’re still working on it.”

As if on cue the office door opened again, and Izzy entered with a triumphant smile and a sheet or paper. “I think we found it.”

“That was fast.” Alec took the sheet and nodded. “So this is the building?”

“If not this one then another. There are a lot of mausoleums like this one on that particular graveyard.”

“Great.” Alec looked at Magnus and nodded again, then squinted at the page. “ _Cimitero Monumentale Verano_.”

“Your Italian sounds atrocious,” Magnus quipped as he got up.

Alec cast him a look from under lowered eyebrows but refrained from commenting. When can you be ready to portal to Italy?”

“How about now?” Magnus rubbed his hands. “The sooner we get this over with, the better.”

“Good. Give me fifteen minutes to get a team ready. I meet you in the Ops centre.”

Magnus looked expectantly at his brother. “Fancy a trip to Italy?”

Phoenix got up as well. “I’d like to help, if I can.”

“Since you’re the only one who can reliably identify the building we need, definitely,” Magnus replied and gestured towards the door. “ _Italia_ , here we come.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't quite know what happened and how I got here, but the plot bunnies have escaped. So if someone finds them, please return them to me so I will again spectacularly fail at containing them.

Due to time zones it was already late afternoon when the team arrived in Rome, which wasn’t a bad thing since the closest Magnus was able to portal them was the Colosseum. The time and the fact it was raining made it a lot easier for them to arrive undetected, and they got on the way towards the cemetery at once. It was a 45 minute walk, and by the time they arrived they were all drenched.

Yet after almost another hour, they still hadn’t found the right building. They started all over and covered the whole graveyard once more, but to everyone’s – and especially Phoenix’ – frustration, none of the buildings triggered any of his memories. 

He ended up sitting on a wet bench under a dripping tree, staring at the picture for a while before closing his eyes to summon back the memory. But no matter what he did, all he got was the starlit sky, because he hadn’t done more than cast a quick look over his shoulder after leaving. 

“I think we’re going about this the wrong way,” Izzy said. “Which isn’t to say I have a solution.”

“What do you mean?” Alec turned around to face her.

“We were thinking about a mausoleum, a grave, because Phoenix talked about a crypt of some sort.” Izzy looked at Phoenix with an encouraging smile, and then back at her brother. “But this building could be any size. It could be a church for all we know, because we don’t know how far away he was when he turned around.”

A dismayed silence hung in the air for a moment.

“So we’re back to square one,” Jace said, and pressing his lips together, dropped back his head. “Damnit.”

Phoenix buried his face in his hands with a groan.

“Phoenix, it’s not your fault.” Alec took a few steps towards him. “You did the best you could.”

“And what now?” Clary looked around. “We have to do something to find out where we need to go.”

“If you have a suggestion, I’m all ears,” Alec said and lifted both eyebrows as he looked at her.   
But Clary dropped her arms with a huff and looked away with a shake of her head. 

“Phoenix,” Izzy said then and sat down next to him. “Do you think you can project the picture again? For more detail? I don’t want to pressure you into something that-”

“I can,” Phoenix interrupted her. “I can try. Maybe I can get more details down this time.”

Phoenix closed his eyes again and summoned back the memory. Magnus sat down next him when he began to shiver, and kept his eyes firmly on his brother’s face. It wasn’t fair that he would have to put himself through this over and over again, and Magnus was sure that while he was fine now, there would be a price to pay later. 

And it wasn’t even sure it made a difference. The picture, after Phoenix had adjusted it, looked only marginally different. Izzy took the sheet from Phoenix’ unresisting fingers and narrowed her eyes, while Magnus rested one hand on his brother’s thigh. Phoenix didn’t look at him and shook his head.

“It’s not your fault,” Magnus said. 

Jace took a step forward and looked around before looking back at the two warlocks. “But is there nothing else? No other picture? No other-”

“Can I just remind you of the fact,” Magnus cut in and got up, “that not only was he in a terrible state of mind, stumbling through a portal after centuries of being banished into the wastes of Edom? Not to mention that he was under a demonic possession?” He huffed out an angry sigh. “You’ve seen him, after all, when you brought him to the Institute. And that was after he had had fifty years of adjusting to being in this realm.”

Jace gritted his teeth and crossed his arms. “Sorry,” he muttered and turned away.

Magnus refrained from further lectures. While he could understand that Shadowhunters had an important job and were trained to have no other priorities, sometimes he needed to remind them that not everyone had been brought up with that kind of drill. And while they might be used to Magnus being able to solve their problems at the drop of a hat, his brother wasn’t just a second, less fashionable version of Magnus. He had just been through a year of intense therapy to put himself together into a person again, and-

“Magnus.” Alec said with a small, lopsided smile, tearing Magnus out of his thoughts. “You can lower your hackles. No one is blaming your brother for anything.”

“Then stop demanding things of him he can’t deliver,” Magnus said, maybe a little sharper than intended because Alec lowered his eyebrows and opened his mouth. 

Before he could say anything however, Phoenix got up from the bench as well. “Magnus, I can speak up for myself,” he said with a wry smile.

“I know,” Magnus said flatly. “But you’re not doing it.”

That brought Phoenix up short, and sucking at his lower lip he combed his sodden hair back with one hand. He nodded, swallowed and looked at Alec.

“Sorry, but I can’t do any better than that,” he said firmly, meeting Alec’s eyes. “I can do another hundred projections, but it’s not going to change anything. That’s all I have.”

“Thank you,” Alec said, equally firmly. “I know that can’t have been easy.”

But then Izzy stepped to Phoenix’ side with the picture. “That here,” she said and pointed at a larger structure to the right. “That’s not part of the building, is it?”

Phoenix took the picture and narrowed his eyes. “I’m not sure,” he said slowly. “But it... it doesn’t look like it.” He handed the picture to Magnus who held out his hand. 

“It really doesn’t seem part of the building,” Magnus said and tilted his head. 

Both Izzy and Magnus stuck their heads together over the sheet of paper that was kept dry by Magnus’ magic, while Phoenix stepped away from the group, arms tightly crossed. He stared straight ahead with gritted teeth, standing as still as one of the statues around them. 

“Hey, Biscuit, can we have another opinion?” Magnus waved Clary over. “Is this a part of the building?”

Clary looked at the image for a long time, tracing a few lines with her finger. “I’d say no,” she said thoughtfully. “Also, see this? It looks like a mirror image of that part of the building.”

“A mirror image?” Izzy. “As in, water?”

“Phoenix?” Magnus called, and Phoenix turned around again. “Do you remember water? A well, a fountain, or anything like that?”

Phoenix narrowed his eyes for a moment before closing them. “I do remember I found water to drink,” he said slowly. “But I don’t remember when or where.” He opened his eyes again. “But if that’s a fountain, then I guess that’s what I drank from.”

“It’s a possibility.” Magnus looked back at the picture. “Also, the building looks as if it’s damaged.”

“Ancient ruins?” Izzy asked him.

“Ancient, or not so ancient.” Magnus fate lit up and he snapped his fingers. “And I think I know who to ask about it.”

Truth to be told, his contact, if he was still alive, wasn’t the most reliable of sources, more so if his smoking habits had gotten any worse. But the Shadowhunters didn’t need to know that. And even if they did, he was their only hope now, so that was that.

“He’s a bit of a loner, which is to say, he’s a hermit,” Magnus continued and conjured up a piece of paper. “And while he might be able to help us, there’s no guarantee he’ll reply any time soon.”

“So...” Alec watched as Magnus projected a message onto the paper. “Now we have to wait for one of your magic acquaintances to make time for us?”

“We do,” Magnus said and the paper went up in flames. “In the meantime, I suggest we find someplace warm and dry. And I could use a drink.”

“We’re not here for a holiday, Magnus,” Jace said sharply.  
“Then by all means.” Magnus held out the picture him. “Feel free to continue the search. I’ll be having some authentic Italian espresso somewhere while I wait for Olmo.”

“For what?” Alec asked.

“For whom.” Magnus smiled brightly. “My contact. Anyone else up for an espresso?”


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My deepest gratitude to my dear friend LaMalefix for the idea with the Dead City and help with the Italian because a native speaker friend is always better than google translate. Love you! 
> 
> I put the translations in the footnotes.

Magnus had just ordered a round of espresso when a scrap of paper appeared next to him in a small burst of sparks. He caught it, and as he read it his eyebrows rose almost into his hairline.

“That was unexpected,” he said after he had quickly sent a return message.

“So we won’t have to go back to New York to wait?” Clary asked.

“Indeed not, because he is willing to meet us.”

Alec looked up at him. “Where?”

“He said he’d come and find us here, so we can thankfully stay put and enjoy our drinks.” Magnus smiled brightly and picked up his cup. “But one thing is important: Do not ask about his face. Understood?”

Confused looks were exchanged around their table.

“Just... don’t.” Magnus put his cup down. “Don’t ask about his face and for all that is sacred do not ask if he has a seelie in his family tree.”

The looks were even more confused now, but Magnus seemed pacified when everyone assured him to remain discreet, although he kept eyeballing Jace every now and then.

They were on their second drink when the jingle of the bells above the door announced another customer, and a brilliant smile spread on Magnus’ face as he got out of his chair.

The man approaching their table was dressed in a colourful sari-like garment, and somewhat messy, dark grey hair curled around his face and fell to his shoulders. He was wearing flimsy leather sandals despite the weather, and overall, he looked like a Woodstock hippie that time had forgotten about. If Woodstock hippies would have a face adorned with moss-green veins, that is.

The newcomer spotted Magnus and opened his arms as he hurried across the room. “ _Bello mio!_ ”

“Olmo, _mio caro!_ ” Magnus replied and the two embraced, and exchanged a few cheek kisses while slapping each other’s shoulders. “ _Grazie di essere venuto subito!_ ”

“ _Qualunque cosa per te, carissimo!_ ” The stranger smiled brightly, his eyes shining bright. They had the same colour as the veins on his face, which explained why people might think he was a seelie.

“Hey, sorry but my Italian is a little rusty,” Jace cut in. “Could you say that in English?”

Izzy slapped his arm with a hiss and he looked at her and mouthed ‘ _what?_ ’ while spreading his hands, palms up.

“Oh.” Olmo finally seemed to realise Magnus wasn’t alone. “Your taste in company used to be better, _amico mio_.”

“I know he’s a Shadowhunter,” Magnus said quickly, “but please don’t hold it against him.”

After casting Jace a long look, Olmo let his eyes roam over the other Shadowhunters, but when he saw Phoenix, his mouth fell open.

“ _Accidenti!_ Magnus! I didn’t know you had a son!”

“It’s not... Magnus forcefully cleared his throat. “He’s my brother.”

“Your brother?” Olmo seemed even more confused now. “Where did he come from?”

“Edom.”

“Oh.” He looked at Phoenix again with narrowed eyes. “Of course.”

“Anyway,” Magnus said and indicated towards his brother. “Let’s skip any more formalities. Olmo, my brother Phoenix. Phoenix, and everyone, this is my dear old friend Olmo Amaranto, and if anyone is able to help us, then it’s him. Please, have a seat.”

Magnus didn’t waste any more time and as soon as Olmo had taken a seat, he produced the picture and explained the bare bones of their problem; his brother’s escape from Edom and their quest to seal the portal which they assumed to be in the building shown on the picture.

Olmo took the picture, looked at it, tilted his head to one side, then the other. “Antica Monterano,” he said and put the picture down.

“And that’s it?” Jace looked up but Magnus silenced him with a flick of his hand.

“Does that mean you know where this is?” Magnus asked his friend.

“I just told you,” Olmo replied with raised eyebrows. “The dead city. Antica Monterano. If I was looking for a portal to Edom, I would start there.”

Magnus looked at his companions and nodded. “Seems like we have our lead.” Then he addressed Olmo again. “Can you take us there?”

“Only one portal away, _mio caro_ ,” Olmo replied with a bright, warm smile.

Magnus quickly paid their bill, and without further ado, they found themselves a small back alley where Olmo cast a portal for them.

Antica Monterano was a large collection of ruins, a city, as Olmo informed them while leading them past the buildings, that had been abandoned in 1770 after a malaria epidemic.

“And there we are.”

It was the building from the picture, and looking at it from across the fountain left no trace of doubt. Every pair of eyes was on Phoenix now, but he had his hands shoved deeply into the pockets of his coat and stared at the front of the old, crumbling ruins with an expression that was impossible to identify.

They followed Olmo into the building, and down a flight of stairs into the catacombs. The Shadowhunters lit their which lights, while Olmo cast a small orb of silvery magic that hovered above his hand. The darkness around them was absolute, and the narrow hallways and seemed to go on forever, the stairways seemed to lead them down into the belly of the earth.

A thick layer of dust covered the ground, almost undisturbed, and in the white surface, the footprints were clear to see. A single line of footprints of someone wearing no shoes coming from the depths below, but none going down there. Nothing and no one had been down here since Phoenix had crawled out of the building more than half a century ago.

At the bottom of the stairs was another long, narrow corridor, so low Alec had to duck his head. Being the same size Phoenix had to do the same, and his was gritting his teeth so hard his cheekbones protruded. But when Magnus laid a hand on his arm, he managed a smile.

“Let’s go,” Alec said, and the six Shadowhunters and three warlocks proceeded to follow the narrow corridor, and down yet another flight of stairs.

The corridor at the bottom wasn’t nearly as long as the other and even lower, and ended in a small chamber containing a large sarcophagus, without decorations or carvings. Just a plain, granite stone box covered with a thick lid. The air was heavy, and it smelled of dust and decay.

“No portal in sight,” Jace remarked, totally unnecessarily.

“But this is the place,” Izzy said. “We saw Phoenix’ footprints.”

“And only his,” Alec said and stepped towards the sarcophagus. “Does this mean the portal vanished?”

Yet by the facial expressions around him no one believed it would be this easy, Alec himself included. But then Phoenix stepped towards the sarcophagus and put a hand on the lid.

“It’s warm,” he said with a frown.

“Does that mean the portal is inside the coffin?” Jace asked and stepped closer to the granite block.

“Seems like the logical conclusion,” Magnus said and went down into a crouch next to the sarcophagus.

“So can’t we just seal it?” Alec asked and crossed the room, narrowly avoiding banging his head on a lower hanging beam.

“If that is hiding a portal to Edom, then a few Shadowhunter runes aren’t going to be of much use,” Magnus said absentmindedly. “It would be attempting to fix a breach in a dyke with a few rolls of toilet paper.” He looked at Alec. “No offence,” he added quickly. “Because warlock magic might be able to seal the sarcophagus from here, but something powerful enough would still be able to breach the seal from the other side.”

Alec smiled at him to say no offence taken, and all three of them looked at the sarcophagus again.

Then Magnus took a deep breath and snapped his fingers, then used his magic to push the lid side, but very slowly. And as suspected, a red light spilled out of the granite casket as soon as the lid was even a crack wide open.

“I can’t remember crawling out of a granite box,” Phoenix said slowly. “But here we are.”

“And by the looks of it you even politely closed the door behind you,” Magnus said as well and pushed the lid completely aside.

The red light spilling out now filled the whole chamber, and directly inside the sarcophagus it was almost too bright to look at. Magnus examined the light for a moment and his facial expression turned from thoughtful into dismayed.

“This isn’t a portal,” he said. “It’s a rift.”

“And... what’s the difference?” Jace asked.

“A portal is something that was created, no matter if by a warlock, or a demon.” Magnus leaned forward to peek at the light again. “A rift is a natural occurrence. There has to be a special leyline junction directly below us.”

“Oh.” Olmo said and pushed himself off the wall he had been leaning against. “You didn’t know that?”

Jace glared at him. “You could have told us!”

“You didn’t ask,” Olmo deadpanned and crossed his arms.

“So that means?” Alec said firmly to stop the rising argument.

“It means,” Magnus said slowly, “that closing this isn’t as straightforward as I hoped it would be.”

“Why am I not surprised,” Alec muttered under his breath and stepped back to Izzy’s side.

“So.” Clary looked around. “Course of action?”

“The rift has to be sealed from both sides, which means one of us has to go through.” Magnus looked up at his brother. “So you will seal the rift from here, and I do so from the other side.”  
Phoenix simply nodded.

“Are you familiar with that sort of spell?”

“Not familiar, but I know what I have to do.” Phoenix shrugged with a wry smile. “Theoretically.”

Magnus nodded and proceeded to go over details of the spell with his brother, and once Phoenix declared himself ready, Magnus stepped towards the edge of the sarcophagus. But he looked up with a puzzled frown when Alec shouldered his bow and stepped beside him.

“Alexander...”

“I’m not letting you go in there alone.”

“I can take care of myself.”

“I don’t care.” Alec’s face seemed chiselled in stone. “You’re not going in there alone.”

“Settled then,” Jace added and stepped to Alec’s side. “Alec won’t leave Magnus, and Alec isn’t going anywhere without me.”

Magnus heaved a heavy sigh, but then he shrugged. He looked at Olmo with an almost apologetic smile.

“At least these ones are loyal,” Olmo said and produced a pipe from a pocket hidden somewhere in his garments. “Buona fortuna, amico mio.”

“Let’s hope we don’t need it,” Magnus said and climbed into the sarcophagus.

The moment his feet touched the ground, he was gone. Alec didn’t hesitate for a second and followed, and Jace did the same.

Then Phoenix stepped towards the sarcophagus, and flicked his wrists to activate his magic. His hands encased in blue light he lifted his arms and sent a single tendril of magic into the rift.

“There you are,” he muttered after a moment with a smile, and opened his palms to pour a steady stream of magic into the rift. After a minute the light began to dim, and he stepped even closer and focused on the stream of magic.

Suddenly the light vanished from his hands and he dropped his arms.

“Phoenix?” Izzy hurried to his side. “What’s wrong?”

“Magnus...” He whispered. “He... he stopped.” Then he looked at the rift with widening eyes. “Something... something is wrong.”

And before Izzy or anyone else could do or say anything, Phoenix gripped the edge of the sarcophagus and jumped into the rift.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bello mio - my beautiful/my buddy  
> mio caro - my dear  
> Grazie di essere venuto subito - Thank you for coming right away  
> Qualunque cosa per te, carissimo - Anything for you, dearest  
> Amico mio - my friend  
> Accidenti! - Gosh!  
> Buona fortuna, amico mio - Good luck, my friend


	15. Chapter 15

Not for the first time in his life, Magnus desperately wished he could actually read the future. Clouds, birds, entrails of various animals, crystal balls… anything to enable him to avoid situations like this. Not only was the portal no portal but a rift, but the process of closing it had lured some of the creatures of Edom to their location, who picked up discharges of magic like a bloodhound does a scent.

And fighting those beasts, and three of them to boot, was the very last thing Magnus needed right now, because sealing a rift of that size would drain both him and his brother dry. He could not afford to spend too much magic on fighting flying, fire-breathing behemoths. And rarely had he been so happy to have indulged Alexander to remain at his side. He had brought the first one down, and once it was on the ground, he and Jace had disposed of it. That left two, however, and while the two Shadowhunters did their best, it wasn’t enough to keep Magnus’ back entirely free to seal the rift.

Magnus was worried about what his brother would think when he felt the absence of Mangus’ magic in the rift. He would be worried, maybe even afraid, and now Magnus was spending too much magic on fighting the demons. They really, really needed backup, and he hoped with all his might that Phoenix would send the other Shadowhunters. But the trace of relief he felt when he sensed the rift being activated instantly evaporated when he saw just who had come through.

He had hoped it wouldn’t happen, but really should have known better.

The moment Phoenix’ feet touched the red sands of Edom he froze, forearms slightly lifted, and his face was blank with terror. Of course, having felt the absence of Magnus’ magic he had concluded that Magnus was in trouble and had jumped through, most likely without thinking, and was now paying the price. And now Magnus had to correct his earlier sentiment because the absolute last thing he needed now was having to deal with a traumatized brother who was falling into a panic attack.

“Get back!” He screamed at his brother. “Phoenix, get back!!”

Magnus could see him shudder, but then his trance-like state was suddenly broken when one of the demons swooped down, and Alec fell back with a scream of fury and pain. His bow was knocked out of his hands and Jace immediately jumped to his side, but a seraph blade was not going to be of any use against a fire-breathing demon.

“Alexander!” Magnus screamed and threw a huge burst of magic at the beast, but it only delayed the creature for a moment.

But that moment was enough for Phoenix to finally unfreeze, and he dashed forward to Alec’s side. Magnus wanted to scream again but it got stuck in his throat in sheer horror when he watched his brother trying to shield his husband from an inevitable, bloody end that would devour both of them.

But the moment the flames would have engulfed them, Phoenix threw up his hands, and the fire dissipated on the surface of the shield he had cast. It was a powerful shield, as it withstood the full force of the demon’s breath, and during that time Jace had managed to reach Alec’s side to activate his iratze. Momentarily perturbed the demon ascended again with a few beats of its wings.

Moments later Alec scrambled to his feet again and dived forward to grab his bow. But for now, the demon was out of range. Phoenix cautiously dropped the shield and gave Alec a look of concern.

“You okay?”

“I am,” Alec replied, slightly out of breath but smiling. “Thanks to you.”

“Yeah, that was some great timing,” Jace added and the three of them looked up to scan the glowing skies of Edom for more of the creatures.

“It’s coming back,” Jace said in a growl.

“Yeah, and the other one is still out there as well,” Alec said, his eyes darting across the sky. “There it is.”

But as the three of them were focused on the trajectory of the second demon, the third suddenly appeared above the crag of rocks behind the rift. It hurled a burst of magic right at Magnus’ back.

“MAGNUS!” Phoenix screamed and broke into a run, but Magnus managed to react just in time so the blow only grazed him instead of hitting him full in the back.

But now the other remaining demon joined his fellow and the two descended down on the four men together. Magnus was still on the ground and tried to get onto his feet with a groan when two bursts of demonic fire came raining down on them.

Phoenix reacted fast enough and had his shield up in time, but the force of the two blasts brought him to his knees. His shield held however, and since the two demons now remained in one spot for a moment to try and break through Phoenix’ defense, Alec could have a clear shot. Being able to take proper aim this time his arrow hit home, right into the eye socket of the larger of the two demons. Its scream of agony lasted only a second before the magic in the adamas-tipped arrow did its job, and it disintegrated into a cloud of sizzling sparks that were gone before they hit the ground.

But the force of two surges of magic at once had rapidly weakened Phoenix’ shield, and the other demon had not given up yet. Phoenix pushed against it with all his strength, a scream of pain and frustration pressing out of his throat as the heat began to bleed through the rapidly decaying shield.

Alec loosened another arrow, simultaneously with Magnus hurling a huge blast of magic at the beast. The attack on Phoenix’ shield finally ended, and as the beast hit the ground, Jace was already waiting to deliver the final blow.

The two Shadowhunters exchanged a breathless, satisfied smile, but they instantly broke into a run to reach Magnus’ side. He was kneeling on the ground, cradling his brother in his arms, his face a mask of horror and grief.

“God, Magnus, please…” Alec fell onto his knees beside him.

“He’s… he is still alive,” Magnus said.

But trying to hold the shield against the demonic fire had taken its toll on him. His clothes were scorched and torn, his hair had caught fire, and his forearms and face were badly burned, covered in red, weeping blisters. His hands and fingers were so badly burnt that they were blackened in places.

“Get him out of here,” Magnus said to Alec, his voice flat and husky. “Get him to Olmo. Tell him he has to take over, and let’s hope to the mercy of fate any of us has enough magic left to fix him after this.”

“And what about you?” Alec asked with a frown.

“Take him to Olmo,” Magnus almost barked. “Now. The creatures are gone and I will be done here before any more show up.”

“How can you be so sure of that?”

“Get him out of here!” Magnus yelled. “Now!”

Alec took a deep breath, but then he got up, took his stele and activated his strength rune before hoisting Phoenix into his arms. He groaned in pain, but otherwise didn’t move.

His heart racing and his stomach churning in terror and pain, Magnus watched Jace and Alec vanish into the rift. But then he shook his head, gritted his teeth, and activated his magic again.

* * *

Alec’s knees hit the edge of the stone sarcophagus as he stumbled through the rift, the passage made difficult by Phoenix’ dead weight in his arms. Jace, who had been on Alec’s heels, now helped him out of the granite casket and they gently lowered Phoenix to the ground.

Izzy was at his side in a heartbeat. “By the angel,” she whispered in a trembling voice. “What happened to him?”

Olmo had dropped his pipe when the two had appeared and was instantly on his knees beside Phoenix’ unmoving body as well. “ _Oh signore..._ ” he muttered, his face lined with dismay.

“You need to seal the rift,” Alec said to him. “Before any more of creatures show up that did this to him.”

Olmo took a deep breath, looked at Phoenix’ burnt face, but then he tore his eyes away and got up. He clapped his hands, and dark green light interwoven with golden tendrils appeared between his palms.

“What happened?” Izzy asked again, looking up at her brother.

“Demons,” Alec replied, his eyes glued to Phoenix’ face. “Fire-breathing ones.”

Izzy shook her head. “Why did he have to do that!”

“If he hadn’t, I’d be dead now,” Alec said flatly, and Izzy flinched at his words.

“What?”

“I was down, and he was just in time to cast a shield over me, so Jace could activate my iratze. If he hadn’t shown up when he did, I’d be nothing but a pile of ash now, and Jace too.”

Everyone looked at Phoenix now whose eyelids began to flutter. His groan of pain petered out into a whimper.

“Magnus,” he whispered, his voice hardly audible, cracked and hoarse with pain.

“He’ll be here soon,” Izzy said gently. “Everything is going to be fine.”

Behind them, the red light began to dim, and finally, the rift snapped shut with a sudden drop in air pressure that made everyone’s ears pop, and that kicked up small clouds of dust in ripples coming from the sarcophagus.

Moments later a portal appeared and Magnus stumbled out, pale-faced and disheveled, and hardly able to keep himself upright. He reached Phoenix’s side the same moment that Olmo did.

“Please tell me you have enough magic to fix this,” Magnus muttered and looked up.

But Olmo was already summoning his magic again and poured a gentle, steady stream of the green-golden light over Phoenix’ body. He groaned again as the magic began to knit his damaged flesh together, but opened his eyes upon hearing Magnus voice mutter gentle encouragements.

“Magnus,” he whispered.

“I’m here,” Magnus said in a trembling voice. “You brave, stupid idiot.”

“Are you okay?” Phoenix was breathing heavily, but at least his face was now no longer covered in blisters.

“I am, thanks to you,” Magnus replied. “And I can’t even tell you off for jumping in after me.” He swallowed hard. “Because without you I’d have lost… I’d have lost Alexander.”

Phoenix managed a tired smile. “But you are okay?”

“Everything is fine.”

“And the rift?”

“The rift is gone, Phoenix.”

“Good.” Phoenix closed his eyes again with a relieved, heavy sigh.

Magnus kept shaking his head as he looked at his brother, who had braved his worst nightmare just to come to his aid. Magnus couldn’t even begin to imagine what kind of terror Phoenix must have felt upon stepping into Edom again, but he had rallied himself, picked up the fight, and while he had paid a terrible price, they had all succeeded.

But since he couldn’t take Phoenix’ hand yet, he rested one palm against his brother’s cheek. Phoenix opened his eyes again.

“Oh you,” Magnus whispered, his voice heavy with emotions, gratitude, the remnants of fear, worry, pity, and fondness. “When you said you’d burn down the world for me, I didn’t think it would include yourself, or I would have stopped you from saying it.”

Phoenix flinched as Olmo’s magic touched an especially tender spot, but he still could summon another, slightly wry smile.

Olmo worked fast and efficient, and once he had healed all of Phoenix’ burns, he went and found his abandoned pipe again that he lit with a snap of his fingers. He took a deep breath of the fragrant herbs and sighed.

Phoenix took the hand Magnus offered and let himself be pulled upright into a sitting position. “Thank you,” he said to Olmo. “Thank you.”

Olmo waved it aside with a huff. “All in a day’s work.”

Phoenix breathed out a little chuckle and then lifted his hands to drag them down his face. He faltered, and with his eyes flying open ran his hands over his head.

“Ugh,” he muttered, and grimaced. Then he flicked his wrists to summon his magic, and ran his hands over his almost bare scalp.

“Vanity runs in the family, eh?” Jace said with a small snort after Phoenix had finished sorting his hair.

Phoenix glared at him. “Tell me you wouldn’t do the same.”

Jace looked down at him for no more than a second before he grinned. “I totally would.”

The burst of laughter that followed this exchange was maybe a little too high, a little too loud, fuelled by the broken tension and sheer relief. Alec pulled Magnus and then Phoenix to their feet, and then everyone looked at the stone coffin again.

“I shall keep an eye on that,” Olmo said and used his magic to close and seal the lid of the sarcophagus. “I let you know if anything happens that I cannot deal with on my own.”

“You have my eternal gratitude, _mio caro_ ,” Magnus replied, and the two embraced fiercely.

They then left the chamber and the catacombs behind, but it was clear Phoenix was having a strange déjà-vu as he left the building again in the middle of the night, with starlight reflecting in the waters of the fountain. He just shook his head however, and since he was the one with most magic left, he opened a portal.

“Take care of yourself, _bello mio_ ,” Olmo said and embraced Magnus again.

“I will, _carissimo_ , don’t worry.” Magnus stepped back and smiled at him. “And thank you again, from the bottom of my heart.”

Instead of an answer, Olmo just huffed again and produced his pipe. He made a shooing motion towards the portal before he lit it, and clamping his lips around the stem, he crossed his arms and watched as they vanished into the portal one by one.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this was it. For me it was quite the ride, as I usually edit myself to death with the chapters that I upload, and throwing out a chapter a day without spending a week on polishing it was a big thing. Thanks for reading and commenting, you all made my day.

Due to time zones it was still in the middle of the night when they all emerged out of the portal behind the Institute in New York. Alec immediately dismissed all the other Shadowhunters and exchanged an embrace and a quick kiss with Magnus before rolling his shoulders.

“Are you not coming?” Magnus asked.

“In a bit,” Alec replied and looked over his shoulder at the Institute. “I need to get the report done. When I requested clearance for the mission I immediately had three different Clave representatives breathing down my neck. Permanent portals aren’t popular.”

“You don’t say,” Magnus replied drily. “Well go on then, Shadowhunter, do your job. I’ll see you.”

Alec sighed, but with a smile, and turned around to head for the door. 

“Home?” Phoenix asked as Magnus faced him again.

“If you would be so kind,” Magnus replied. “I’m... drained.”

“I know.” Phoenix took a step towards him. “Are you okay?”

“Just magic depletion.” Magnus smiled at him. “I’ll be as good as new after a bath and some food and some sleep.”

“Good.” Phoenix nodded, relief in his eyes, before he flicked his wrists and opened a portal. “After you.”

Once the portal had closed behind them Magnus faced his brother again with a critical look. “And what about you?” He asked. “Are you going to be okay?”

Phoenix took a deep breath. “I will be.”

“Are you sure? Because...”

“I know,” Phoenix said into Mangus’ somewhat helpless pause. “Going back to Edom was... It was terrifying. But in the end, I think it was a good thing I did. Because...” He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. For a moment, he just stared ahead, his eyes unfocussed. “Edom was a memory, or rather, a thousand memories, all blurred together,” he continued slowly. “Sometimes it felt... thinking back I mean. It felt as if the memories I had of Edom wanted to swallow me whole.”

Magnus kept his eyes on his brother’s face, but Phoenix seemed surprisingly calm, given what he had just been through. 

“I think facing that nightmare actually helped me,” Phoenix said then and looked at Magnus again. “Because Edom isn’t a monster waiting to eat me alive. It’s just a place.” He huffed out a mirthless chuckle. “A bad place, full of bad memories. But still, just a place. I went there, and I left again. And it couldn’t hurt me. Not... not like that.”

Magnus looked at him for another moment before he stepped closer to put a hand on Phoenix’ shoulder. “I will never be able to thank you enough, for your incredible bravery. Stepping into Edom after what happened to you, it must have been horrible. But you found the courage to come to our aid, and I will never be able to thank you enough.”

Phoenix gave him a one-sided shrug. “I honestly didn’t even think. Not before I was actually through. And then I kind of... I think deer in the headlights is the term.” He avoided Magnus eyes.

“Phoenix, look at me,” Magnus said gently.

Phoenix did so, but only very reluctantly. 

“That leap into the portal? That took courage. And yes, you suddenly had to face your worst nightmare heads-on, but you were stronger. You are strong, Phoenix. So incredibly strong.”

“I just... I couldn’t...” Phoenix exhaled forcefully, his eyes on the ground. “I just had to do something. I’m just glad I could get over myself in time.”

“A momentous victory for you,” Magnus said firmly. “And if you don’t believe me I’ll call Sura so she can hammer it into your head.” He squeezed his brother’s shoulder. “Be proud of yourself!” 

After a moment, Phoenix looked up at him with a rueful smile. “That is exactly what Sura would tell me.”

“Then it has to be true, hmm?”

“I...” Phoenix shook his head. “I just... it’s difficult to be proud of something that... it wasn’t a choice, you know? I had to do that. So it’s kind of pointless to be proud of it.”

“See, that’s where you are wrong.” Magnus rested his other hand on Phoenix’ other shoulder. “Because you had a choice. You made the choice to jump through the rift. Maybe it felt like you didn’t have a choice, but no one and nothing was forcing you, apart from your own will. And you were afraid, weren’t you?”

Phoenix nodded, pressing his lips together.

“And you did it anyway. You were afraid, and no one would have ever blamed you for staying put because of what you have been through. But you did it anyway.”

Phoenix looked away and licked his lips, then exhaled through his teeth. “I just don’t want to make a hero out of myself,” he said in a low voice.

“You don’t have to,” Magnus said, his voice gentle and low as well. “But to everyone else, what you did was heroic.” 

Magnus’ throat began to burn, as well as his eyes, remembering that horrible moment when he had seen Alec fall. “Even if you don’t feel it, the way you... you saved Alec’s life.” Magnus closed his eyes for a moment, and his voice became unsteady. “Alec is...” When he looked at his brother again, Phoenix’ dark eyes were resting on him intensely. “He is everything to me. My world. My heart. Without him I would...” Magnus swallowed again. “I thought my heart was about to stop when I saw him fall, and then you swept in... and saved him. I honestly...” Shaking his head, he bit his lower lip. “I don’t know what I’d do without him, Phoenix. So to me, you are a hero.”

Phoenix looked at him again, his eyes telling Magnus that he clearly didn’t agree with him. Magnus decided to not push the matter any further, and gently slapped his brother’s shoulders before stepping back. 

The brothers looked at each other for a moment before Magnus rolled his shoulders. “I’d suggest a shower and food and then bed. How do you feel about that?”

“That’s the best thing I heard all day,” Phoenix replied with a lopsided smile. “Is there anything you fancy?”

“You don’t have to spend any more magic on conjuring food.” Magnus smiled warmly at his brother. “This is New York, and I know several great places that do a 24/7 delivery service. So just take your pick, and after a shower we can eat.”

Alec arrived shortly after the food, but they had ordered more than enough. After he had taken a shower as well they all shared a little nightcap in companionable silence. 

“Phoenix,” Alec said as the latter was about to head for his room.

“Yes?”

“I need to thank you,” Alec went on. “You saved my life.”

“Not you too,” Phoenix replied with a sigh. “I didn’t do it to play hero.”

“Of course not,” Alec replied, a small frown on his face. “None of us do. Shadowhunter, or warrior, or not, we all fight our battles as we have to. We don’t have to talk about this again, you know? But you saved my life, and I want to thank you.”

After a moment, Phoenix nodded, but as he had reached the door he turned around again. 

“Magnus?”

“Hmm?”

Phoenix licked his lips, and hesitated for a long moment. “It’s... it’s quite possible... no, it’s more than possible. I’m pretty sure I’m going to have a nightmare or two tonight, but I do have my tools and coping mechanism to deal with it. So if you hear something, don’t worry. I got this.”  
“Okay,” Magnus said calmly. “But please don’t hesitate to ask for help if you need it.”  
Phoenix gave him a gentle smile. “Thank you.”

* * *

As expected, Phoenix looked a little exhausted the next morning; he clearly hadn’t slept much. But he wasn’t in a bad place, as whatever he used to deal with his nightmares and flashbacks was obviously quite effective. Still, during breakfast Magnus couldn’t stop himself from asking how he felt, to make sure he would be okay. 

“I’m fine,” Phoenix replied with a slightly tired but honest smile. “Tired, because I didn’t sleep as much as I wanted to, but I’m fine.” He met Magnus’ eyes. “It’s nothing I haven’t dealt with before, you know? I knew that anything involving Edom would trigger something. And honestly...” He shrugged. “I never expected to spend the rest of my life without anything bad ever happening to me again. I know life deals you shit sometimes. So if something happens I have to deal with it, but the point is that I can deal with it, thanks to Sura.”

“And thanks to your inner strength,” Magnus replied. “I can’t imagine that a lot of people would have survived what you went through. And I don’t mean your body.”

Phoenix shrugged. “Maybe not? I don’t know. Sura said there wasn’t much left of me, so I’d say it’s mostly her merit.”

“If you hadn’t been so resilient and strong...” Magnus leaned a little forward. Phoenix, after all that time being possessed? That there was anything left of you is nothing short of a miracle. And if that isn’t a testament to your strength, than I don’t know what is.”

Again, just as last night, Phoenix seemed uncomfortable facing that kind of praise, so Magnus just poured more coffee and offered his brother the French press for a refill too.

Alec had listened to the conversation in silence, and now he leaned back with his coffee in hand, and looked at Phoenix over the rim of his cup. “Phoenix?”

Phoenix looked up at him. “Hmm?”

“Do you know what happens now? ” Alec asked. “With you, I mean. And I don’t say that to get you out of the apartment as fast as possible. I’m just curious.”

Phoenix stared into his coffee.

“I’m not really sure,” he said after a long, thoughtful pause. “I haven’t had the time to think a lot about this. I mean, I know what I’d like to do, eventually. Sura said I have an affinity for healing magic, and I like that thought, actually. Doing something like Catarina, so at one point, I want to go to a university and study medicine.” He took a sip of his coffee, but his eyes were focussed inwards. “And I talked with Sura, who said she could teach me too. I mean I know I’ll never be as good as her, but if I can help other people the way she helped me... I like the thought. I really do.”

“Noble intentions,” Magnus said with a proud smile. “But you said eventually, which isn’t me criticizing your planning. I think you should find your feet first, get used to the new you, and the place you have in this world and here, with us. Your family.”

Phoenix blinked a few times and his eyes focussed on Magus again. He smiled, but his eyes were misting over. “Thank you,” he said softly. “For everything.”

“I like to think we’re over the phase of exchanging countless versions of thank you,” Magnus replied firmly.

“Even though I need more help of you?”

“You know that I love to help.” Magnus smiled at him. “And I love to help you. You’re family. You’re my brother. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.”

Phoenix looked into his coffee, a smile on his face and a faint glow on his cheeks. He blinked furiously a few times and sighed. 

“What do you need?” Magnus asked calmly. 

“I guess,” Phoenix began and took a deep breath, “I’m going to have to stay here for a while. But I also want to... to travel a bit. There are a few places I’d like to go back to, places I’ve been to during the last fifty years. I feel that... I feel I need the closure, going back there in the knowledge that I made it.”

“That’s very understandable,” Magnus replied. “And if you need money and papers for that, then I’ll gladly help with that.”

Phoenix sighed and shook his head, but he smiled at his brother with moist eyes. “I know that, Magnus. And I’m grateful, but it feels kind of wrong... living off your money, I mean.”

“You could treat it as a loan,” Alec supplied now. “Magnus can give you anything you need, and eventually you’ll be able to pay him back.” He shrugged. “I mean, you two got all the time in the world for that.”

“But you don’t have to,” Magnus added quickly.

“But Alec is right,” Phoenix replied. “Thinking of it as a loan makes it... a lot easier for me.”  
“Okay,” Magnus said after a deep breath. “A loan it is.”

* * *

For his first journey Phoenix decided to travel the mundane way, like the way that had brought him here, only not as a crew member on a freight ship but on a plane. Magnus saw him off at the airport, and once he had accompanied his brother as far as he could, the two embraced firmly. 

Phoenix didn’t let go of Magnus’ shoulders yet after loosening his embrace, and leaned forward to rest his forehead against his brother’s.

“I know I’m not supposed to anymore,” he began in a low voice, “but thank you, Magnus. Thank you for everything.”

“It’s okay,” Magnus said equally low. “But this is the last thank you I shall accept.”

Phoenix chuckled softly. “Fair enough.”

Then he stepped back and shouldered his bag. “I’ll be seeing you.”

“Safe travels,” Magnus said and smiled warmly. “And remember. Home is just a portal away.”  
“I know.” 

Magnus nodded and took a step back. “Good bye, Phoenix.”

Phoenix smiled at him, his eyes warm and shiny with emotion. “Good bye, brother.”

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The picture of Phoenix was made by the wonderful LaMalefix who you can also find on tumblr. She did some other beautiful Malec fanart as well!


End file.
